hey guys,

So SO long since i've written in here, i know, but i havent really had a lot to say i guess!!

so here's the latest!!


I paid for my lap top yest so that should be arriving by tomorrow or monday, very excited about that too as i can now use msn messenger at home and all poetry and finally start getting my book together, tres excited!!

have a new weird fascination with hilary duff, not acutally entirely fascinated by her but am appreciating her music (what the fuck, rach i truelly am becoming a pink pop princes but i put that down to the fact that i am softening, a hippie and no longer fight for the dark side, mwah ha ha ha)

Trace has been in sydney and doesnt get back until sunday, but frankly i am over our friendship, she is always moody, unhappy, picky etc and i just dont need that shit. i want a friend who isnt always draining on my energy and locking herself away in her room, i think we have lived together too long because the fairytale is surely fucken over!!

have been churning out fuckloads of poetry and am now turning my attention to short stories and articles for like magazines and newspapers. speaking of which i really need to get back into my journalism course and i have made a few attempts over the past few weeks but never seem to get there, grr..tres annoying!!

Am feeling really rushed and shit at the moment and like overwhelmed and too over committed to my friendships and not committed enough to my life. like i have been spending so much time with my friends that i am literally screaming out for time to myself but then it seems everytime i try for that a new friend comes into my life (or old one that has been gone for awhile) and interrupts that quiet time, because i a:want to see that friend and b:feel obligated to be thre for them when they need to talk.

A recent new development in my life (taht introduction is grammatically crap but i dont care) is a friend from work who came over for coffee on monday and talking to him and getting to actually see how lost and shy he is, was a complete turn around to how i actually perceived him to be; self assured, confident and settled. so not and i also knew this is another person taht eventually will be under my wing and i fucken wonder if i can take anymore on, seriously. i am really feeling th need for that other half, mister where are you?? because merija is definately needing some attention and tlc for her from someone, just not my friends because i realise that isnt there role!! and i try as much as possible to give that to myself thru scientology and spirituality but it just doesnt cut it sometimes, i really need a man to lean on! not need, but i am feeling that it would be so wonderful if i did.

hmm...so yes...things with iona and i still crap and quite frankly i dont care. if things work out, they do, if not, oh well.


Hmm rant over, back to the phones

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