writing community
Sign In Here | Lost Password | FREE Sign Up
E-mail: Password:
Remember login  
The place for writers:
Upload your writing in minutes, receive peer feedback from other writers, poets, authors, then get your work published out there in the real world.       Learn how other writers are doing it.

 
Driver8
chris mills
United Kingdom, Bristol

Words: 913
Access: Public
Comments: 5

Forward to a friend
Print Version
E-mail this writer E-mail this user 
View Author profile
Add to Readers  




Hal

Hal was the first, a work of art constructed many years ago when Ernest was fit, young and vital. Over the decades three more had been added; each an improvement on the last, with their own personality and abilities; but Hal was the first and Hal would be the hardest to leave.

Ernest lifted himself from the armchair which had become his only comfort in recent times. From this chair he could lose himself for hours, just daydreaming, or gazing over the lawns so lovingly tended by Hal. He moved slowly to the table, less than a couple of metres away, and wheezed. Supporting himself with his right hand he awkwardly pulled a chair from under the table and fell gracelessly into it. He wheezed again.

The central remote lay on the table in front of him. Picking it up with weak, fragile hands he pressed the button labelled Sally, followed by the Call button.

Thirty seconds later Sally walked into the room and smiled. The smile almost brought a tear to Ernest's eye. She was the last he had built, seven years ago, and he had taken twice as long to complete her. Her features looked almost human, with delicate eyes nestled in a flesh-coloured face, but the prosthetic skin she wore was now tattered and frayed. None of his creations had been programmed with emotions, but as Ernest looked into her eyes he sensed that she knew something final was approaching.

When Ernest had designed Hal to assist him with his chores, all those years ago, he could never have imagined how he would come to create three more, and how they would become his friends. But today, as he said goodbye for the final time, he felt that he was losing a part of himself.

Pulling his gaze from Sally's sweet face he picked up the remote control and felt for the button marked Huey.

Huey was quicker and more nimble than Sally. He had been built for those difficult jobs requiring dexterity and Ernest had to admit he was the most heavily worked of the quartet. Occasionally he felt guilt at just how much work Huey got through. He glided into the room and stopped with a flourish. Huey had aged well. Ernest had sculptured his face to display a healthy grin, and it was this grin that greeted him now.

Ernest picked up the remote control for a third time. After pressing a couple of buttons Alfie appeared. Dressed in a freshly-pressed suit, Alfie displayed the stature and demeanour of the classic English butler upon whom he was based. He bowed briefly and stood with elegance. The unhealthy squeak he emitted as he moved was the only sign of his decay.

Ernest dropped the remote control to the table. He had only Hal left to call. Then it would be almost over. Wishing he could delay the end indefinitely he stopped and smiled at the three friends in front of him. He felt guilty at what he was about to do, but he had left himself no choice. He had grown to rely on them in so many ways, but he had not anticipated that they would come to depend on him equally. Without them he could not have survived, particularly in the last few years as he tired and became less capable. Now he was unable to carry out the routine maintenance and repairs they required, they too had started to fade and age.

He pressed the call button for Hal and dropped the remote to the floor. He would not be needing it again.

Hal appeared, a lot slower than the first three. His right arm hung limply by his side and his eyes no longer moved. Ernest knew that Hal had only a few weeks left but it didn't make the farewell any easier.

As all four stood in front of him, Ernest nearly succumbed to the emotion welling inside him, but he had rehearsed this in his head many times and was determined not to let himself down. He called Sally forward. Fumbling awkwardly, he opened the cavity at the top of her chest. Inside was a short grey switch. He whispered a goodbye, then gave the switch a flick. He could not bear to watch as the light in her eyes faded to nothing.

Huey was next, followed by Alfie. As he said goodbye to each of them the silence in the room became almost overwhelming.

He called Hal over and paused. For the hundredth time he wondered if he had the strength to continue, but he knew the alternative for Hal was a slow and ungraceful end. Closing his eyes he moved Hal's switch with a click and listened as his last mechanical breath left his body.

Ernest did not cry. He needed all his energy for his closing act. Pulling himself to his feet he stumbled the short distance to his armchair and slumped into it. He was pleased that this was where it would end, his eyes taking in the beauty of his garden one last time. As he watched the sun disappearing slowly behind the tall fir trees that framed his lawn he smiled an exhausted smile. Then, with a precision and strength that surprised him, he opened the cavity on his own chest. Taking the switch between his thumb and forefinger he paused, enjoyed one final breath, then flipped the switch to the off position.

Want to comment on this Short Stories?
Sign up to Edit Red and you will be able to comment on Short Stories and get access to: Upload your own stories and poems, get readers and their feedback, promote your work...
Sign up






[Back to top]
Comments  
tcbswan Comment by: tcbswan Online- 2006-07-23 02:06
Add to Readers
      
This is a wonderful story, beautifully touching. Unexpectedly moving and the ending equally clever without being mechanical. I love this story! great job.
t.
Driver8 Comment by: Driver8 - 2006-06-06 02:27
Add to Readers
      
Thanks for your comments. It mostly came in one draft, but I spent a fair amount of time trying to write the final line!
sailorblue Comment by: sailorblue - 2006-06-02 18:51
Add to Readers
      
A beautifully crafted short story. It flows and reads easily. did you make many drafts? I loved the end and will watch out for other stories from you.
Leigh Comment by: Leigh - 2006-04-06 05:18
Add to Readers
      
I really like this. A neat, quirky idea, though sad at the end. To inspire such reader sympathy for a group of robots must take some doing!

At first, obviously, I wondered who or what Hal was, and how - if he had been 'constructed' by Ernest - he had managed to tend the garden.

This is the first story of yours I have come across, Chris. I shall now browse more of your work...
JayBrown Comment by: JayBrown - 2006-04-06 03:49
Add to Readers
      
A very good story this. Nice little twist at the end.
1

Sponsored Ads


Added to Library of:

By Driver8

Featured Writers

Advertising - Terms & Conditions - Short Story Submissions - Contact - Writing Competitions - Writing Links - Book Promotion - Sky-Tribe.com - alanemmins.com
  Member short stories, poems, comments and other contributions are owned by the poster.
Copyright 2003 - 2007 Edit Red I/S