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Handshakes at Sunset
[cento]
The sunset's hectic rant paints itself
Across tumbling hills, as the colours blend:
Lemon, mango, peach, and
Orange lights spangle over hillsides;
Pinkened with cerise from the
Round red watermelon sun.
In the pin-prick dead of night,
Alabaster lights suddenly shoot upwards.
Stars are awkwardly drawn in the midnight sky -
Each one of them standing like a shadow:
Singular silhouettes in this slow and
Dry-mouthed stretch of night.
The snow-caked roofs are coloured
With bland Submission:
Overexposed, like an X-ray,
And just as monochrome.
Risk an open eye and feel the ice hit your iris:
As the rigid landscape weeps
And is sent out of sight; somewhere, becoming rain.
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Comment by: gtallen - 2006-04-12 14:53
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| I agree with Kiwi Scribbler..keep it simple. Your strength is really in your short, powerful splotches of fresh imagery. |
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Very sunny feeling here. "Lemon, mango, peach, and
Orange lights spangle over hillsides;" like this description, you can feel a placid sunset there and kinda can smell sometihng citrusy. |
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| Some gems of expression: 'pin-prick dead of night' and a 'watermelon sun' You've got the touch; keep it simple and I think you'll get better and better! |
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Comment by: - 2006-04-03 15:41
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| I love the description in this poem of yours. It's almost like I can see a vivid picture painted in my mind. |
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"Meagre Portions"
Offering a small glimpse of some of the words that informal grae - Graeme Sandford - has cobbled together over the years in an attempt to become rich and famous through his writing. Sadly, he is poor and unknown (largely due to his writing).
So, what are you waiting for?
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