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Funeral of a Nursery Rhyme [revised 25/08/06]
Sing a song of nonsense,
A poem full of verse.
Lines of mice in black chase
A double-decker hearse.
Boggle-eyed and singing,
Tuneless in death's pomp;
Raw veins popping purple,
In false dignity they romp.
Top hats and coat tails,
White with pride and glee.
Staffs, topped with silver,
From the walnut tree.
Drumming corpses to their end,
Singing souls unto the sky,
Taking money for the pain
Of seeing us mortals die.
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This is great!
"Drumming corpses to their end,
Singing souls unto the sky," - awesome!
I really enjoyed reading this. |
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| What a great poem! The first paragraph is my favourite, and the whole poem works very well. I feel inspired! |
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Comment by: - 2006-04-13 02:21
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"Tuneless in deathâ??s pomp;
Raw veins popping purple,
In false dignity they romp."
I'm really liking your stylistic choices these days. Perhaps I should go back and reread some of your other poems. Daaammmnnnn! That last stanza is really fu**king good. I can't help but want to use a whole bunch of expletives, cause it's 5 in the morning, the city traffic outside my window has slowed to a lull, I've been reading a whole bunch poetry and I was getting sorta groggy and then, purely by random, I decided to go check out some latest uploads and blam! this and 'Thoughts of a Psychologist' just got me all pumped back up and inspired again. Thank you! |
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Comment by: propgrl - 2006-04-12 03:51
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| I agree with Colin Dardis - those are the only places I tripped up as I sang it to the tune of sing a song of sixpence. It was automatic! I didn't even realize I was doing it until half way through :) Good work! |
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When I was reading this, I was desperately trying to remember how 'Sing A Song Of Six Pence...' went! Fantastic images here, really visually appealling. My only little niggle are: "Lines of mice in black
/Chase a double-decker hearse"- I would put the line break after chase, and "Hallucinating, Shakespearean"- just seems to be to many syllables in this line, a bit of a mouthful when reading it out, and therefore hard to fit into the overall lyrical quality of the piece! |
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