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reasons not to love jimmy
I need to make a list
of reasons not to love him
because even Humpty Dumpty
gets sick of falling off the wall
if only it were as simple as
jimmy and me and three hundred miles
but he wraps himself in my voice
builds me a pedestal
sets me on it
makes all the right promises
at all the wrong times
I carry his words with me
and I've come undone
I submit to his whirlwind dream
make a pilgrimage to him
we make each other real
and I cover him in kisses
hold his hand until
he lets me go
and every mile apart
echoes in my chest
jimmy wakes up without me
but I am still dreaming
of promises and sweet nothings
like butterflies I can't catch
and I swallow a gallon of tears
because he is building a wall
that I know I will tumble from
I need to make a list
of reasons not to love him
I need to peel my own eyes open
take him at face value
give up plucking petals from daisies
he loves me, he loves me not
mail him back his promises
allow him guilt-free caresses of new bodies
but my heart is a stubborn girl
once she makes up her mind
and I need to make a list.
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I love these lines:
but I am still dreaming
of promises and sweet nothings
like butterflies I can't catch
and I swallow a gallon of tears
because he is building a wall
that I know I will tumble from
Illustrates that the heart wants what it wants and we don't choose who to fall in love with. Very good. One of the best I've seen here! |
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hey.. I like the comparison to humpty dumpty. very clever indeed.
somehow parts of the poem read more like prose than poetry, but its alright.. it works here. In general, so I've been told, it is better to use metaphors rather than similes in poetry.. some great poet once told me that similes make a poem weaker. I don't know why. I'm just repeating what I was told. all that aside, I really enjoyed reading this poem and thought it well written. very creative. ~Kris~ |
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| I like it it is the fact they move on but our hearts linger on and play games with our emotions and you are finding a way to fool it back and let go. It is the hardest lesson we learn about love. We may always love them but they did not give us the same promis, Wonderful relation between words and emotion. No emotion is ever cliche |
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| I liked it, but abuse is a stronger emotion, she is hiding her pain, trying to conceal his abuse of her. Let the reader know how you really feel. Great title. |
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| I really liked this poem, I really think its relateable, I enjoyed it. |
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