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| I liked how this poem seemed breathless; the fan is speechless and dumbstruck (in more ways than one) faced with their idol. Very cool. |
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Comment by: - 2006-04-20 01:30
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you've outdone yourself frances, this one is outstanding, very original voice and rhythim, bravo!...ciao...
tony |
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Excellent repetitive use of adjectives in the same lines, such as "Eye-viewed Seen Watched" to elongate the rythmic meter. Good use of mixed/compund metaphor. Effective use of pun such as:Likeness of you Liked in grief This end of love". Alliteration used to empahsise smoothness in some lines with prolific use of conssonance (using words with heavily pronounced conssonant sounds) to disjoint aspects of the stanzas to give a halting feeling.
Excellent descriptions of arthouse cinema merged with nostalgia of a love that ceases to be.
Brilliant! |
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This is a well-written poem Frances. In a way it reminds me of a film reel going round with all the words and images you've conjured up. For me though, I think the second last stanza is the best.
The ending reminds me of a poem i once uploaded which i still can't bring myself to read, as its too painful and personal. |
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Comment by: - 2006-04-18 19:09
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| I think this is quite good. I like the halting metre, which adds to the sense of hesitation and melancholy. It's a lovely piece. :) |
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