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Holden Blake
Kerry Mc Donald
Denmark, Derry

Words: 185
Access: Public
Comments: 9

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Domestic

Don't look at my eyes, for they tell it all


Shut them back behind curtains, or face the wall


Avoid my presence, try hard to forget


What your body wants to but your mind won't let



Scream at me in frustration, slap my shrouded face


Each hit you land on me is a moment you erase


Try to tell yourself that what happened wasn't true


Distort with a fist, beat it black and blue



You'll kiss me when tomorrow comes, buy me something new


Promise me no more, then pretend to start anew


And I accept it every time, but no more do I believe


Your empty words and tired oaths do little but deceive


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Comments  
Kowalski Comment by: Kowalski - 2007-07-04 12:24
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I like it. It has power and simplicity.

For a moment I thought it would be about a servant. After reading it I assume "Domestic" represents domestic violence?

I commend you for going to the trouble to write it as actual poetry rather than writing prose and calling it poetry, as is commonly done.
Comment by: - 2006-05-18 14:23
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You certainly know how to tell it like it is. Well done.
mom Comment by: mom - 2006-04-30 18:48
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Very powerful. Nerve wrecking. Loved it. Keep it up.
chilliray Comment by: chilliray - 2006-04-27 03:18
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very powerful and unsettling. writing which has the power to disturb is very strong writing.
Scribe Comment by: Scribe - 2006-04-26 09:18
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You nailed this well. Reads nice, good flow but still sends a strong and determined message.
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By Holden Blake

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