at first i was afraid to love and then i discovered my heart,at first i was scared to be me then i knew i've been me from the start. When i say at first i start from the beginning. Sometimes life can take you behind doors that makes u feel captured,and also life can make you understand more day after day. As i grew  up i never understood the concept of life and how to live by it and the more i grew the more i understood. I say i felt pain but how can u feel love without feeling pain.  Being lost for so long made me understand how sometime your mind can play tricks on you. When you say you love someone and can't live without them u soon start to believe that. What is is love ? a good question to me, since i still haven't figure it out yet.  Going back in the days when love was all i needed and being held while i tried to reach out and cry or when i'm screaming at nights and no one could hear me. Out of it all i now understand that love can make u abuse and misuse it, or is love what we're really abusing...maybe it's ourselves. U learn from your mistakes and you grow day by day. Sometimes you have to stop and think have i grown to hate. Have i face my past or am i'm still living for my past. I can say  i walked away, i can say i don't care but i can also say whatever i need to believe. Man it sucks being lost. I'm feeling lost of words, lost of strenght, lost of my identity but not lost of my beauty. Sometimes i feel like i'm fighting the enemy but the more i fight i realize the enemy is me! yeah crazy that someone else is holding my identity