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Roselee
Roselee
United States

Words: 1088
Access: Public
Comments: 4

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Heritage - New prologue!

Prologue
Note:This has been completely re-writen. If you've read the old version, I'd like to know which you like better.

The forest around her was quiet. Too quiet. Her trained muscles, though young, were tense and ready to bolt as her senses strained for signs of her enemy. As usual, they gave no warnings, though she could feel their eyes on her, watching her every move. She carefully surveyed the area once more, trying to gain a better vantage point, but the heavy storm clouds that gathered overhead, along with the rapid approach of nightfall made it increasingly difficult to see through the thick jungle foliage. A column of smoke rose behind her as what was left of their makeshift home was burned.

'We have nowhere to go now,' she thought. 'We can't hide or fight back. All we can do now is run, and when they catch us''

A year ago, her mother would have scolded her for saying that. 'We'll work it out, micha, they just have to learn to accept us, that's all,' she would say. Or her father would remind her that they must be strong. But they were both gone now, and she had been left alone in a world that wanted her dead, too. Or worse.

There was a sudden noise in the forest, and the girl froze. A gust of wind brushed her long black hair away from her face, revealing sharp gray eyes alight with panic. She heard the sound again, a low hiss that faded into the wind. A branch snapped and the girl almost fled, but once again, she forced herself to remain still, not wanting to give way her position unless it was already taken.

The third time it was too close to be ignored. She backed away slowly with silent, almost liquid movements, and melted away into the darkness. The forest was quiet again, except for the whispered taunting of the wind.

The black haired girl crouched low in the underbrush; almost certain she had not been seen, but ready to run if necessary. A few more moments of calm passed, and she relaxed somewhat.

Then something burst out of the jungle behind her. The girl had no time to react before the creature was on top of her, tearing at her with its claws. She acted on instinct, breaking away from it and running blindly into the forest.

The monster followed her without a moment's hesitation, gaining on her with every step. It ran on all fours, and was slightly smaller that she was, with a stunted, gnarled look to it. With bone clearly visible through its skin in some places, the beast was also quite a bit stronger than it appeared.

A second, smaller creature appeared from nowhere and latched onto her like a leach, it fangs grazing her arm as she pulled it off of her. The small cut was accompanied by an unusual burning that spread slowly up her arm.

The girl ignored it and kept running, but more of the creatures appeared, some of them attempting to tackle her as the first one, while the rest snapped at her heels. The narrow trail had turned to mud and was increasingly difficult to follow, and it soon disap-peared altogether. Roots, rocks, and vines seemed to jump in front of her; she tripped several times and finally fell hard enough that the creatures caught up with her. They swarmed like wasps, scratching and biting at anything that moved, including each other, and she managed to escape in the commotion.

By now she was beginning to tire, and the arm that had been bitten was almost completely numb. One of her attackers realized this and surged forward, taking the girl by surprise and knocking her over. She fought back desperately, her innate, uncontrolla-ble magic surfaced, and the attacking creature burst into flame with an inhuman scream. She fled yet again and they followed her without a moment's thought to their fallen com-rade.

She ran like she'd never run before; she could hear water up ahead. Every time her family had to run from these creatures, they would always loose them at water. The creatures could or would not get near water. Whether or not the monsters realized there was water ahead, they gained on her. The faster she ran, the faster they ran. One of them leapt forward and just barley missed her.

'Just a little bit further! I can make it, I have to!' she screamed inwardly.

She made it to a clearing at a bend in a river. There was a twenty-foot drop be-tween her and the river she'd hoped would save her.

'I'll have to jump,' she told herself. 'It's the only way''

But she never got the chance. One of the more human-like creatures caught her and quickly overpowered her. It held her arms pinned behind her back, with its elongated nails digging into her wrists.

'Why, if it isn't the little princess. We meet again.' a familiar voice hissed in her ear.

She swore under her breath.

He relaxed his grip a little. 'Oh, I'm so glad to hear you missed me, we''

She never let him finish his sentence. Using all the strength she had left, she tore away from him and threw herself over the cliff.

It seemed like she fell forever, until she finally plunged into a river that was much deeper and swifter than she had expected. She managed to struggle to the surface several times, only to be pulled back under by the current. She was tiring faster now, with the venom from the bite taking its toll.

Then the current became stronger, keeping her under the water and away from the life-giving air above. She held her breath for as long as she could, with her whole body screaming. Colors flashed at the back of her eyes, and she fought to get to the surface with all her strength, but the current only pulled her further under.

Too tired to fight it any longer, she inhaled water and passed out. Unknowingly, she floated downstream towards another of her enemy's minions.

*******************************

I'm still working on this, and the next chapter is close to being finished. Please stop by and read more later, and don't feel you need to read all of it to leave a comment. I need all the help I can get on this one.

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Comments  
Comment by: - 2007-09-06 00:59
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Very tense piece. Looking forward to more.
Malacite Comment by: Malacite - 2007-05-09 08:39
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Interesting. A feeling of suspense combined with confusion fills this, maing it very... intense. There are a few moments where the flow becomes a bit muddled, such as when she's falling. There almost needs to be a seperation between the falling forever and her finally hitting the water. Still, very good stuff. Cannot wait til the next chapter.
lojsmirage Comment by: lojsmirage - 2006-05-12 07:16
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Pretty decent read, it flowed very well together. Have you ever read anything by Tamora Pierce by chance?
Comment by: - 2006-04-24 18:22
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Fantastic, I like this heaps. Keep it up
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