Mr. Banker

Part One- Mr. Edwards

Mr. Robins was having a headache. Being the Principal of the 7th National University, one among the largest chains of universities in the US, was stressful. Especially when the academic performances of the students were troubling him. Every day, he was receiving calls from furious board-of-education directors, over-protective parents, and nosy journalists. There was already a report in the local newspaper about the falling grades of students.

'What am I supposed to do if they don't study? Horse whip them until they get 'A' grades?'� he asked.

Mr. Robins, however, decided to take action. He asked his secretary to make a full report on every student's academic performance. The report was promptly made, and Mr. Robins marked every one who got Credit or Failed. There were four levels of marks in the university. Highest was High Distinction; second came Distinction, and then Credit. Just below Credit was Fail. The statistics weren't good. About half the students had gotten Credit or Failed.

'Mrs. Alice, I want a-'� started Mr. Robins but his secretary cut in,
'Yes, sir, I know. You want a report on all the Credit or Fail Students isn't it?'�
'Wonderful, Mrs. Alice. You never fail to surprise me.'� Mr. Robins said.
Neither do you! She thought.

The next day, 5 pages were present on Mr. Robin's desk. He ticked name after name. 'All these students come from poor academic backgrounds.'� His pencil kept ticking'� until it reached the last name. 'Mr. Edward Miller, (alternate name) Mr. Edward'� Mr. Robins read. He read Edward's report. Ever since he joined the university 3 terms ago, Edward has gotten straight credits'�although his professors gave him A in class room performance.

Feeling intrigued by this student, Mr. Robins read Edward's bio data and found nothing interesting. The lad had passed every exam he ever took, but only just passed. He had gained admission into the University by writing an entrance test- which he just passed.

A thought occurred to Mr. Robins. If Mr. Edward could somehow be convinced to study hard, he might to do well for the University. 'Well, I have always been the shepherd that looks after the flock, so why not give it a try?'� He thought to himself, and set about to meet Edward. He stepped out of his office, and looked at his watch. 10:00. Perfect Timing, Mr. Robins thought. The students were having their recess and the teachers would be free to talk.

He went into Edward's economics class, and met Mr. Skipper. 'Mr. Skipper, what can you tell me about Mr. Edward Miller?'�

'Oh, Edward, that fantastic young man. He is so charming. I like to call him James Bond of this class'� said Professor Skipper. Mr. Robins raised his eye brow.

'What I mean is that he is a really smart, youthful, and intelligent lad. One whom you can always count on.'�

'You do know that this Edward has just passed every test he ever wrote. Meaning that the poor lad never held a report with an A on it'� asked Mr. Robins.

'Oh, Sir, I wasn't talking about his Academics. In every thing else, behavior, charm, knowledge'�'�

'Well, Professor, in case you are not aware of it, this is a University, not a James Bond screening test. We need academic performance, not charm and all that nonsense. Tell him to meet me in my office will you?'� Mr. Robins turned and left the room.

The next day was certainly no less pleasant for Mr. Robins. He had a fight with the local newspaper editor, spilt coffee on his shirt, and hit Mrs. Alice on the head, by accident.

Just as he was trying to sort out the mess that he had got himself into, there was a knock on the door. The door opened, and a man came in. He was almost six foot tall, and of average physique. Wearing a full sleeve shirt, along with black pants, he looked like a business executive. There was a small but obviously important suitcase in his hand, which he seemed to carry wherever he went. There was a sort of charm in his face and it was neither square like, nor was it rounded. Instead, his face was broad at the top and came tapering down, until his cheek bone projected forward. There was something special about his eyes, as though they contained magic. Right now, they seemed to be smiling at Mr. Robins. As the man at down in a chair, without waiting for Mr. Robin's invitation, the principal smiled broadly.

'Ah, Please be seated. Now you are'�?'� Mr. Robins asked in a pleasant voice.

'I am Mr. Edward Miller, also called Mr. Edward. You wanted to see me?'�

Mr. Robin's pleasantness vanished, and he spoke in a cold voice. 'Mr. Edward, are you aware that you have been consistently getting pass marks in all exams that you wrote in this school?'�
'Yes sir, I have received my report cards,'� Edward answered.
'Mr. Edward, do you know that you are studying in one of the best schools in the country?'�
'Yes sir, that's why I joined in the first place'�
Mr. Robin's facial muscles tightened. He spoke again, this time trying to be more pleasant. 'Mr. Edwards, do you know that all the professors have a high regard for your intellect and charm? Then why is it that you do not do well for the exams?'�

'Well firstly, thank you for the compliment, sir. And the reason that I don't fetch mark is because, the examiner crosses out 60% of my answers. There really is nothing that I can do, sir.'� Said Edward

There was an abnormal change in Mr. Robins. He couldn't hide his anger any longer, and he burst out, 'That's it! I cannot tolerate your cheekiness any more. Mr. Edwards, do you know what I am going to do?'� It actually was a rhetorical question.

'Pray tell me, sir. I haven't been blessed with telepathy.'� Edward answered.

'You, you'�I am going to give you an exam!'� Mr. Robin's words didn't have their desired effect.

'Thank you sir. Didn't have one in the past two weeks. Really was getting sad, you know-'� Edward said, but Mr. Robins cut in,

'Oh, not just any exam. This exam will have ALL PORTIONS that you've studied. ALL! And it's going to be on next Sunday- 4 PM'�

Edward blinked an eye. And then he got up from his seat and moved towards the door. 'Sir, thanks for your concern. I will, I assure you, pass.'�
'Oh, that's the exciting part. The PASS mark is 60%!'� Again no effect. Mr. Robins really was loosing his touch.

'Yes, sir, then I will get 61%... and pass. Oh, and sir, you spilt coffee on your shirt. No, not one on your left side. That was spilt hours ago. There is another spill on your right side. It isn't that bad actually. A couple more spills and the green shirt will be fully brown. Good day to you sir'�. And with, Edward shut the door, leaving Mr. Robins furious.

Edwards came out of the building and walked towards his dormitory. Just as he was nearing his dormitory, however, he turned around and looked at Mr. Robin's window. Being assured that he wasn't looking, Edward entered a phone booth, and dialed a number; there was a smile on his face'�

Things took a turn for the horrible. Mr. Robins quickly phoned every teacher that taught Edwards. 'Listen to me. Watch that Edward boy very carefully. Forget about extra coaching, revision and all that. Just observe and spy on every thing that he does, alright? And, I am considering a pay raise.'� The teachers snorted, but said nothing.

Mr. Robins had actually planned to keep Edward's exam a secret. But the university wasn't built to keep secrets. The whole story was soon leaked out to the public.
But things weren't as bad as it looked.

That evening, Mr. Robins saw a few bookies (people who collect bets) gathering around a street light, smoking cigarettes. One of them was saying, 'I got 75 bets saying that Edward won't pass.'�
'I got 243 bets,'� boasted another one.
'Well,'� said the leader, 'we've got more than 1,508 bets. That makes the betting 182: 1 saying that Edward won't pass.'�

Mr. Robins felt unnaturally good, and as though in a daze, gave 500 dollars to the bookies. Even more surprising was that he sang the 'Barney'� song as he walked home. The man really was loosing his senses.

The next day, the school attendance was unusually high. The professors entered classes, and came out, just to make sure that they had entered the right class. During break, there was a mob in the playground.
'My god, are they playing basketball?'� one of the teachers asked, looking at a hundred students, trying to push their way towards the centre of the ground.
'If they are,'� said the music teacher, 'then I guess the hoop is buried in the ground.'� The reason for the gathering was clear. The Bookies were collecting bets.

The mob was quickly dispersed, but not before the bookies increased their betting to 245:1 saying, that Edward won't pass. 'It really is a festival, here, Mr. Robins,'� said the vice Principal.

'Oh, it is'� and it is just going to get started!'� Mr. Robins said gleefully. He looked at the calendar. 5 more days to go before the exam. Just then, Mr. Robins had a brain wave. He rushed to the library. 'Mrs. Smith,'� he said to the black American librarian, 'does Mr. Edwards use this library?'�

The plump, black woman looked at him with confusion, and then burst out laughing. 'HA, HA, my god, Mr. Robins, I never knew that you were so funny. By Lord, that boy,'� she said, her face suddenly straightening up, 'is the only one who uses the library.'�

Mr. Robins looked at the hundreds of shelves all around him. Edwards could be any where in the library, reading any thing. Perhaps he's secretly preparing for the exam!

'Mrs. Smith, would you be so kind as to give me a list of all the books that he reads?'�
Again, a look of surprise.
'You want me to give you the entire list of Economics, and Geography books?'�
'He reads all that!'� Mr. Robins asked.
'Oh, no, he reads some of the books. The problem with that kid is that he shuffles the books, which he reads, so that no one can come to know. I've kicked him out 17 times for misarranging the books. And he's come back, 18 times-'� Just then she broke of the sentence, and ran towards one of the shelves.
Watching the plump lady run, Mr. Robins asked, 'What happened?'�
'Oh, nothing. He rearranged the books again, and I'm just going to kick him for the 18th time'�. And if I know that rascal'�he'll come back for the 19th time!'�

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