Under heavy covers
I can feel her body sticky against mine
She looks satisfied for a moment
And then blankly stares back at me
Her naturally swollen lips pressed together
To form a nonchalant half-smile

I try to whisper the words, "I love you"
But she reaches over
And moves the hair away from my face
Tucking it neatly behind an ear
She always does this
When I'm about to say something
"You look better this way," she points out
Pushing herself away from me

All I can feel in between us
Is this cold empty space
Filled with the intoxicating smell of her body
Worlds away from mine

She leans over the side of the bed
And reaches for a shirt
Putting it on underneath the covers that I hate
"What we did was a mistake," she says
Accidentally hitting me with her elbow
She sits up straight and fixes the side of her shirt
"It was nothing special. We fucked."
She pulls the pillow towards her
And turns her sweaty body to the wall

I stare at the ceiling for a while
Hoping that if I focus long enough
Everything will come crashing down on us
And that I will never have to breathe again

I wake up when she crushes my arm
With her bony hand
She's trying to balance herself over me
So I pretend to still be asleep

She knocks over the CDs on my nightstand
And I can hear them snap under her feet
She doesn't even bother to pick up the broken pieces
And instead shakes them off from her sticky skin

She leaves me before morning
Pushes its way through my bedroom window
Sunlight reflecting off the CD shards
And decorating the walls of my room
With light

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