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Foreign, Familiar Lands
Blinking Supernova, take me away from here.
For I have lost the memories of my childhood,
and I have only present vapors of pain and confusion.
The revelation of buried demons floats to the surface
of my consciousness with the aid of a dead pot-smoking poet.
And I feel no thing but the wind from deep blue waters,
As we drift along on the journey to foreign, familiar lands.
I hear the voice of my lover echo over tunes from
descrambling magnetic discs placed with intention
amongst the folds of my ear.
And I realize that it is all vanity, and I need a Savior.
Darkness is only illuminated with the true name.
Sometimes I wonder what the name really sounds like
and at that moment of purity, I realize I don't need to ask
because God's in His heaven, and all's right with the world.
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I can connect with these two:
"For I have lost the memories of my childhood,
and I have only present vapors of pain and confusion"
and
"The revelation of buried demons floats to the surface
of my consciousness with the aid of a dead pot-smoking poet.
And I feel no thing but the wind from deep blue waters,
As we drift along on the journey to foreign, familiar lands."
Great job. I feel like Im on the same trip... |
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| Intense. You go through so much, it feels quite loaded. No simple answers. I like that. |
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Comment by: - 2006-06-08 03:53
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its not a "name" that can be spoken or heard, only realized. and it CAN be realized... though, to do so, you very likely will have to let go of everything you think you know, everything you hold dear, and these things will be repalced with a totally different knowing of oneness, one that is utterly functional and not just ideolegy (or however that is spelt)...
the costs are mundane, but the rewards, divine...
(and by the way, "god" is neither a "HE" or a "SHE" but "the foundation of all things within our singular human consciousness." the habit of characterising "god" in human terms of reference, genderising etc, is a really, er, ill considered habit, that really does have to be seriously reconsidered... :) divinity may manifest within consciousness in human form, but what other form would we recognise? (i personally have seen manifestations of divinity that had too many tentacles to be all that human, let alone a recognisable gender...) common people have common experiences. uncommon people have uncommon experiences.
(christ on a stick i can crap on... blah blah blah... on and on and on...)
T
T |
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These are some of the lines that I liked.
"The revelation of buried demons floats to the surface"
"I hear the voice of my lover echo over tunes from
descrambling magnetic discs placed with intention
amongst the folds of my ear."
--Nice creative lines but you could look over the transition into the second line. It doesn't seem to really flow or make sense? Maybe just needs punctuation.
"And I realize that it is all vanity, and I need a Savior.
Darkness is only illuminated with the true name."
---I like this. It's sort of ambiguous (up until you mention God of course.) To me the ending seems to sort of trail off. It's not as creative as the rest of the poem. |
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Comment by: alaska - 2006-05-19 02:09
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you reflect my thoughts through shades of brilliance and wonderful timbre. no this is great. "no thing but the wind...as we drift along...." is a great line.
I don't how to take the last line. I guess it doesn't really matter if your intention and my interpretation are congruent for why write poetry if you want everyone to think like you?
Love the poem. |
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