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Feeling that I can never be good enough
Looking at myself in the mirror and having to look away
Crying myself to sleep with a razorblade clutched in my hand
Paying close attention to my life as it slips away
Holding emotions and feelings locked up inside
Struggling to cope with the thoughts within my suicidal mind
Wishing and hoping that one day this will all end
Trying to forget everything that has ever brought tears to my eyes
Knowing deep down inside that this is who I'm destined to be
Denying what I think and what I feel
Living this life feeling nothing but pain and guilt
Regretting every word that has ever seeped through my lips
Seeing the pain in your baby blue eyes
Not wanting to see but there's no disguise
I wish that I didn't have to live like this
Please reassure me that one day I will be happy
Tell me that one day I'll wake up and feel alive
I wish someone would let me know how to live
Take my hand and show me how to get rid of this terrible pain inside
Gaze into these eyes and see that I'm not the girl you look at everyday
I don't know how to go on anymore
Right now the only thing I think of is suicide
Inside I feel like I've already died.
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In your profile you say yoy write about dark things. The gritty reality of life.
This is an excellent portrayal of despair. The emotions are conveyed in every word. You have a very good sense of word choice and rhythm.
We need both kinds of writing--the optimistic, and the realistic. I think your poetry will appeal especially to the many who don't know how to put their thoughts into words.
