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| Got me again. The first stanza grabs quick and tight, and your subtle play on words are very potent and full of emotion. Nice writing. |
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| the permanent smouldering fire within that is not allowed to burst into flame. It just doesn't end does it? But distance does help. Great job I really like this poem |
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| Well, Joni, I'm not quite certain you want my absolute honest thought on this piece, so I'm not gonna give...least not yet. However, this poem seems to the drive behind a longing heart, a flame within that can't be quenched, perhaps something within that is dying to escape but can't be. I get a sense of unrequited love. Very impressive! |
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Comment by: suleem - 2006-05-11 06:10
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| oh my I need to sent this on to my close friend. Her heart is definetly going through this. Great interpretation. |
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Comment by: - 2006-05-11 06:05
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| Like the "elbows rub new skins" and "slow burn". Your work lately seems to be like sketches....not filled in...as if leaving that for the reader to do within their own imagination. This style works for you, but I really like it when you give me something to sink my teeth into as well. It is nice to see you have versatility. - Leah |
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