 |
 |
 |
| |
Your Lips Gave You Away
For not quite one year,
I've prayed you would see
How much I truly long
For there to be
a You and Me.
At night,
I tossed and turned.
It simply wasn't fair.
Finally,
I loved someone.
But would she even care?
I simply couldn't love you,
Not now.
Not this way.
I denyed all thoughts and feelings,
But my eyes gave me away.
They did all my talking.
They knew just what to say.
But still,
I was terrified
You'd turn and walk away.
All by ourselves,
This was it.
I knew just what you'd say.
But I was wrong,
You love me too.
Your lips gave you away.
Want to comment on this Poetry?
Sign up to Edit Red and you will be able to comment on Poetry and get access to: Upload your own stories and poems, get readers and their feedback, promote your work...
|
 |
|
[Back to top]
|
|
 |
Comment by: mitra - 2006-05-12 05:34
|
|
| Hmm.. this one is sweet. The pace and overall mood of it was very calm. Nice work! |
 |
Comment by: - 2006-05-11 11:40
|
|
| absolutely love the title and, obviously, the last line. some great words here. some feel a little forced by the rhyme. but overall, nice poem. |
|
|
At night,
I tossed and turned.
It simply wasn't fair.
Finally,
I loved someone.
But would she even care?
I simply couldn't love you,
Not now.
Not this way.
I denyed all thoughts and feelings,
But my eyes gave me away." your stanzas are very evenly and neatly organized. good work! |
 |
Comment by: - 2006-05-11 06:10
|
|
| I like the vulnerability displayed and (if this is truly from your perspective) the hesitation towards taboo of girl on girl relationships. Seems that scenerio is rather popular these days, no need for reservation ( I'm an old fashioned complete hetero myself, but have many friends that are far more adventurous). I liked the way your eyes spoke and then her lips spoke....it confirmed your interests. Well done. - Leah |
| 1 |
|
 |
 |
 |
|
|