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| this is a toe-tapping, finger-popping bit of funkiness with a very dark heart and serious subject. Great how the whole structure works to underscore the ideas |
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Comment by: suleem - 2006-06-05 16:58
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Ahhh, comfort zones and little boxes we cannot fit into any longer.
You can add pressure cooker to this because here it comes.
Good read |
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| I think you chose a great title for this piece. It holds that much more meaning because you didn't use it in the body of this piece, but the title says it all :) The only recommendation i have (haha and as i always say -when i remember- this is only personal opinion, not a criticism of your expression) is to change 'unable to let go of hard feelings' to 'inability' to bring it into the tense you are using for the rest of the piece. |
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| Wow! Great words, and to the point. It isn't always easy to move forward, and I sure know about the feeling of advancing nowhere. But we move eventually, when we're ready to accept the inevitable. Great poem! |
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Comment by: - 2006-05-25 11:49
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| It is true how the past can weigh us down...till we are unable to move forward. Good write. -Leah |
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