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pack commuted
Christmas family living room
stop watch wait listen
for no god for the catholics there is no god
in case you were wondering
LATE
brownpackaged gift
familiar bargain
Old man's seeded dowry passed in absence of god and motherLATE
Shininggold barbiedolls precede arrival of BEAUTY (wouldn't have worn that dress) and YOUTH (wouldn't have done my hair like that) and LOVE (born in the eighties shouldn't epitomise it).
handwringing blinking speaking
listening willing welling
waiting participating
speaking giving touching
looking
voyeurism.
17th November 2005.
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Comment by: - 2008-07-15 18:38
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i like this poem
it is very good |
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-poor 'they' are all eyes, and the eyes are the most easily misled sense
-typo topographics are very interesting... leading as the poem does to a wail, then ebbing. Wrong "cha-ding!"
-maybe remove the second, lower-case, "register". |
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Hazel,
The parenthetical parts are splendid. Nice poem and configuration of words. Gerry |
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Comment by: - 2006-08-16 19:42
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| Wonderful Piece Hazel. I like the structure and rythym of the piece as well as the message. I had my share of the shining barbie dolls and the meaningless christmas. Thank you for sharing your talents. |
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Comment by: roy - 2006-08-08 09:05
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| Most memorable for me, the last time i went christmas shopping was , in fact, in 1990, not that i was buying christma spresents, just enjoyingt he shopping the day before christmas in London, this poem is to the point, easy to get, and a touch of black humour, which i enjoy |
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