How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Twelve

One to screw it in
A second to test the rim of the light bulb for trace amounts of uranium
A third to investigate the credentials of the Uranium testing lab
A fourth to investigate the moral background of the reporter investigating the Uranium testing lab
A fifth to deny the first light bulb was burned out, and that the whole thing was orchesterated to increase light bulb production in time for the flying saucers to land at Stone Henge on Dec. 21, 2012
A Sixth to produce photographs of the guy who first screwed in the light bulb having lunch in Milan on Halloween with the niece of the Sophormore year in HS chemistry classmate of a VP of a minor light-bulb company
A seventh to deny the authenticity of the photographs
An eighth to speculate as to why the guy who denied the authenticity of the photographs has mysteriously disappeared without saying anything to his friends of family which he always does so judiciously
A ninth to speculate at what the eighth guy is saying during the same interview
A tenth to deny the need for light-bulbs because Tesla discovered free energy 103 years ago
An eleventh to claim the new light bulb is actually a camera-microphone, which patches straight into Dick Cheney's office
A zwolfte guy to produce photographs of the second guy testing for the uranium...why so late...because he's an alcoholic but nevertheless still creditable within the community
There is no thirteenth, because that my dear friend, would be Satanic

Copywrite Paul M Smith June 8, 2006

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