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Evil to the Core
Undying hope and wishful thinking
is how I keep myself from sinking.
Coming at me is a breath of fresh air
that carries with it more concern and care
than most people dare. It is through crimson eyes you stare.
You're in trouble---
Love you don't show and hate you express
You seem to love yourself less and less
Tears you don't shed and friends you repel
It is against democracy you always rebel
To you, happiness is nothing but a farce
The enjoyment you get comes from guzzling at bars
Black is your color and metal music is your soul
Making people cry is your one and only goal
In your home hangs a picture of Jack the Ripper
As the days go by, you get all the sicker
Your family offers help, but you turn them down
It is unrestricted power you want, the almighty crown
Under your reign sins are a plenty
Thousands of people lose their jobs and all you can say is, 'Oh, what a pity.'
Diseases run rapid and people fall in the street
People call out for help, but you turn your head and take pride in your feat
But your power will not last long as you soon will see
Out of power you will soon be
Us liberators will barge right in and take you out
Democracy will reign once again and at you we will flout
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Comment by: Apollo - 2008-01-09 00:50
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Well, well, well... I can't tell if this more about you're frustration with a particular person or an over all disapproval of cynicism... either way you made your point which is the ultimate goal in poetry, so I give you props...
I particularly like the passive aggressive nature of the line regarding "Jack the Ripper" |
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lines five and six make this a little choppy-you may need to change the line breaks.
Thousands of people lose their jobs and all you can say is, ??Oh, what a pity.? is a very long line-you could break it up and add a rhyme like,Thousands of people lose their jobs, steady
all you can say is "Oh what a pity." or something to that effect
People call out for help, but you turn your head and take pride in your feat (this one is very long also and stops the flow of the poem)
The last word needs changing to make it sound better-don't know what you could use but I would rework that sentence.
A great protest poem-someone you know? |
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Comment by: - 2006-10-01 10:26
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I like this undying faith in democracy. This evil person reminds of um...Sadaam? Doesn't matter who it really is but its sad that there are more than one to choose from who live like this. The only changes I would make:
But your power will not last long as you soon will see
(Yes,)Out of power you will soon be
(We) liberators will barge in and take you out
Add the yes to omit redundancy and change US to We because it sounds more grammatically correct. :D
Good poem, Best wishes, JEnn |
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