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My Child
to Mariah Brooke Schenk
I look at her face, so tiny and sweet;
I study her breath and every heartbeat;
I love to hear her laugh with a bubbly coo;
Her eyes are like gems and oceans of blue;
She is gentle and as soft as a lamb;
When I hold her close I forget where I am;
She's my joy in the day & warmth at night;
And out of darkness, she shines like a light;
God has blessed me with love you see;
A love so divine and perfect to me;
And from this love grows a child of grace;
A child I love and will always embrace.
Copyright ©2006 Melissa D Schenk
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| This is so sweet, great tribute to your daughter, your love shines thru. |
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Comment by: - 2007-01-28 21:47
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"And out of darkness, she shines like a light;"
aww, I know that feeling. My best honest critique is to keep in mind that writing from the heart is everything, but the paradox is that when people do, the run into commonplace meanings and phrase, etc. such as:
"child of grace"
I know you have a big heart and I'm not disputing that, and if you want to improve, the only way is to keep writing and on your path, you shall discover many new ways to express yourself, like many of us, we can't wait until our 1000th poem, or many years under our belts.
See, what you expressed in this poem, all great people have known about those feelings, and what we seek is that path that has been walked upon for years, and I know you will look back on this, and know I'm right, that in years from now, what you have just expressed will seem for that time, which is right, but I feel you are ready for more, and remember that down that long path, there lies meanings and phrases so divine and new, that someday you will make God truly smile. :) |
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Comment by: Teri - 2006-09-05 13:32
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| Aw, this is adorable! What a nice tribute to your daughter (beautiful name, too). The only line that throws off the rhythm a bit is "She is gentle and as soft as a lamb;". Minor thing. Very cute and I hope you read this to her every night. :) |
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Comment by: tcbswan - 2006-09-04 21:58
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| this is such a wonderfully sweet and precious poem--but not as sweet and precious as your little one...your love comes through so well...it's a beautiful expression of your awe and wonder. a mother myself, i can completely relate to your feelings and the sentiment you've conveyed. thanks for posting a lovely poem. |
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