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| After he lost his family, bought a tiny apartment on a bad street, went bankrupt, slit his wrist, set his home ablaze, killed his dog, weighted and tied his legs together, and shot himself; Just before he fell over a bridge, into a rapid flowing riverYou are here: Edit Red >> Uploads >> Short Stories >> well lookie here, ma'am!! >> After he lost his family, bought a tiny apartment on a bad street, went bankrupt, slit his wrist, set his home ablaze, killed his dog, weighted and tied his legs together, and shot himself; Just before he fell over a bridge, into a rapid flowing river
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After he lost his family, bought a tiny apartment on a bad street, went bankrupt, slit his wrist, set his home ablaze, killed his dog, weighted and tied his legs together, and shot himself; Just before he fell over a bridge, into a rapid flowing river
The blood flowed freely from his left temple.
He was able to observe, yet unable to perceive,
to think, or to understand all his eyes saw.
{Now, if you could see through his eyes,
you would see that the vision through his left eye
is blurry and stained red.}
{You would see through these eyes -
That the whole world has turned upside down;
Though if you could feel through his heart,
Everything would - for the first time;
In a long time - finally appear to be perfectly normal.}
He felt no pain. And could feel pain no longer.
Be it from the wound of his wrist, head, or his heart.
{He cannot think.}
{But if he could - he would probably think this...}
Goodbye, Life.
Goodbye, Love.
Goodbye, All.
I'll Miss You.
And I'll see you in Hell.
Oh wait.
You didn't really do anything to me, did you?
Awww, shitzits..
I'll take that back.
Toodles!
{He would probably type a smiley face as well}
=)
{Like that one.}
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Comment by: irie - 2007-06-03 19:38
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... I Love It! ...
Such a fantastic title! |
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I absolutely love your title. As I began to read it felt like an abstract structure; one room tied to the next of internal expressions. The colloquial language makes it easy to read and I think I would classify this as a poem rather than a short story. I could've read much much more.
Overall it was like overhearing an interesting conversation on the subway, but then cut by arriving to the station you have to get off at. |
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Haahaa! Excellent. The start (and not just because of the huge writing) caught me...i thought it was going to be a morbid ending! I liked the conversational tone. Very good.
A |
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| that end was just so right! well, you never find out you're a moron before its to lte anyways |
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| It's great how this story shifts from one mood to a completely different one in such a short time, all the while being utterly and completely absurd. This is a story about a man who has lost all and wants to die... and it's hilarious. |
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