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tathas
Joseph Hurley
United States, TX, Conroe

Words: 126
Access: Public
Comments: 4

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Dark Tide

I like to dance in the dark tide
At high noon
To go along for the ride
That'll come along soon

Slipping and sliding
Twisting and turning
Whipping and chiding
Pointing and burning

A little movement
Out of the corner of my eye
Damn sneaky little self-improvement
That'll do nicely to hide the lie

Come, come and behold
This little fractured illusion
Waiting for the story to unfold
In its own beautiful little confusion

Were you looking for a little sense?
Perhaps a bit of a clue?
Well, in my own defense
This is all I know to do

So I'll go on dancing
In my own little dark tide of blue
And to those who might be glancing
Maybe you'll see something that reflects true

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Comments  
LadyEgyptia Comment by: LadyEgyptia - 2006-10-21 08:14
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Lovely work, I really enjoyed this very much!
Comment by: - 2006-10-19 14:20
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well done. 7.5/10. good rhyming
tathas Comment by: tathas - 2006-10-19 12:51
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Thanks for the comment Teri. Went and fixed the problems too, thanks for pointing them out.
Teri Comment by: Teri - 2006-10-19 12:19
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its (no apostrophe)

in my own defense

Great lines:

Damn sneaky little self-improvement
That'll do nicely to hide the lie

Love the rhyme scheme! Not one forced rhyme in the whole poem. Really nice, clean work. Thanks for sharing. T. xo
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By tathas

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