We were given a theme at this writing club I belong to which was "perpetual motion." That is such a bad theme because scientifically it is impossible, so my head went this way:


Everything changed for Africans after President Sipho Masilela heard the word of God which led to his now historical 'Perpetual Motion'� speech. The word came, as it often does, while Sipho lay in the tub, wallowing after a day of ruling an unruly nation.
Just as he reached for the green scrubbing brush to work on his toes, an angel appeared and spoke to him. Somewhat unnerved by the incident, the President stayed in the bath until it was icy cold reflecting on what had been conveyed.
When one hears divine instruction, one does not dawdle about doing what one is told and so the very next morning the President made his speech to the nation. They received it quite well, all things considered.
In full, glowing and messianic splendor, President Masilela began his explanation to South Africans of what was to be done to build a great and powerful nation. He looked so sure and so inspired that people paid attention. Across the nation TV sets were turned on and radios turned up.
'We must not fear change,'� he began. 'It is only through significant pain and discomfort that we contemplate change. Our nation is in agony. God, Himself, has sent a messenger to me with clear instructions of how to shift from a nation of envy and avarice to one of love and charity. To make this change we must accept that each and every one of us needs to form part of a new organism in a state of perpetual motion'�'� The rest is well known.
The President promptly sacked all his ministers and appointed new ones. The difference being he recruited from his beloved Holy Mother Church. The Vatican was delighted ' here was an opportunity to once again shape the spiritual destiny of mankind through direct political intervention. Whilst they would have denied it, the Holy Roman Church felt glee and swiftly sent their best and bravest to support the President.
Minor grumblings and dissent were brought to an abrupt and final end when the President developed a rare case of perpetual stigmata. A perfunctory and joyous investigation by the Pope himself led to the President being canonised and given perpetual rule of the country.
Daily Mass was instituted for the toiling masses. Criminals of act and thought rounded up and put in a holding pen in the Karoo. Police were required to wear glow in the dark crucifixes and carry a large weapon just in case the word of God was not enough to bring sinners to repentance.
National Army Service was reinstated, each soldier in training spending equal time on training of the body and upliftment of the soul through daily Mass and Catechism. The constitution was turfed out and replaced by the ten commandments. It was a busy time for priests.
Sinners were quickly rounded up, given the chance to repent, confess and atone and, when they failed to appear suitably honest, shipped off to a large holding pen in the Karoo desert. Out of sight, out of mind. For the time being.
Eventually, the President and his (spiritual) advisors viewed the rapidly growing Karoo population and pondered what to do with these people. The priests on the ground reported a belligerence that no amount of Inquisition could remove. They were convinced that these individuals who denied the divine teachings of God would never be of use to society. There was much debate around whether the wages of sin should be death or whether the first commandment won out.
So the President prayed.
God answered.
Early the next morning he sent his Holy Armed Crusaders into Botswana. It fell easily and South Africa had established a penal colony within two weeks. Converted Botswanans were welcomed with open arms as they trudged across the boarder. Truly repentant sinners were allowed back, but only to work in the army or join a monastery as penance.
Not long after the Holy Conversion of Botswana, the President became deeply offended by another neighbor.
It was clear that the president of Zimbabwe was not a God-fearing man. His mess was cluttering up the threshold of the Most Holy Country. The President called his advisors to him. They studied the Bible and found that a Holy War can be justified.
The President contemplated his Glorious Army and knew it was overkill. He considered simply sending in ADT to resolve the issue, but decided against it. He suspected that would be the Deadly Sin of Pride and arrogance. Besides, he decided, if a thing was worth doing, it was worth doing in a properly awe-inspiring manner.
Zimbabwe became a province within less than 48 hours. The sinners were smartly packed off to Botswana and the President built a summer home in the sleepy Matopos.
Everywhere he looked on this glorious continent, President Masilela spotted both sin and sinners and he saw that it was not good.
South Africa had swung into motion and began rolling north, east and west spreading the word of God and eradicating sin. The country became a Holy Rolling Perpetual Motion behemoth and the world trembled as it surveyed the God-driven machine behind it. Large, righteous black men carrying a cross and a rocket launcher can convert even the most depraved sinner with extraordinary efficiency.

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