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jessishere
jessica wolsiefer
United States

Words: 198
Access: Public
Comments: 3

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As I Wait

As I lie here waiting,
I hear the sounds of an old house.
creak, creak, creak, creak.
The darkness flows throughout the room;
whips of wind breeze past me.
It's undoubtly cold,
but it's not just in the air.
The aura that surrounds me is cold.

As I lie here waiting,
I hear footsteps creeping their way up the stairs,
they're getting closer and closer.
thump, thump, thump, thump.

I slowly walk towards the door;
the thumping stops.
I reach the door and stop,
and I hear quick, harsh breaths.
Someone is on the otherside of the door.

"Hello?" I manage to squeak. "Is someone there?"
Nothing, nothing responds.
I open the door slowly;
it makes a loud creak.
Nothing, nothing is there.

As I stand here waiting;
I don't hear anything,
but my own quick, harsh breaths.
I squint my eyes and all I can see
is blackness.
Nothing, nothing is there.

Then I hear the thumping agian.
It coming very quickly towards me.
The quick, harsh breaths are closer.

As I stand here waiting;
something jumps out of the darkness,
and licks my face.
It is my dog.

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Comments  
Comment by: - 2006-11-12 11:23
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Excellent, Jessica. I think this would be even better without the last line.
A couple of typos 'undoubtly' (undoubtedly) and 'agian' (and 'otherside' needs a space).
Good stuff.
desperado Comment by: desperado - 2006-11-11 15:38
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haha you got me there you painted a picture in my mind then suprised me by saying it was your dog. was expecting a ghost or something good piece
inviscera Comment by: inviscera - 2006-11-11 14:11
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Very E.A. Poe, especially with the repetition running through it (except of course for the revalation at the end that it's a dog).
1

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