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Purpose
Purpose is that which you do
That ministers even to yourself
Despite the fact that it is meant
For others to see and eat the fruit of
Purpose is never static
But it evolves and sees that
Like you it must grow and grow
The purpose of it
Is to grow you up
To a place where you can see Him
In all of you and all you do
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| i find this piece philosophical which is so fascinating |
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Comment by: Lindy - 2007-07-18 20:20
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Hello...
I have read your poem. A great Poet inspired me to consider writing poems rather than fiction, and I did so, and what do you know, my poems were the first to be published. I valve this fellow writer's suggestions, for she had gone places that I had yet to travel in the poetry arena when we first met, a great Poet and noted National Poetry winner. One great advice given was my choice in titles, and she was right. I say this to say, two things to have this poem work for you to its fullest potential...
1. "Purpose" is a word almost always used, cliche-ish to say. Should you leave this as the title, have the poem work for you in a show-don't-tell painting by chosing words which depict "purpose" as your title rather than telling or defining "purpose." In other words, use any other word in the poem then "purpose." Lead your readers up to the title without using the word in the content of your poem.
2. As I see and feel what you are minsitering to your readers, perhaps give us a new title other then "Purpose" Unless your intent was to restrict the content of the poem in a few short lines, this poem leaps beyond what you have here. Let it flow...
Inclosing, consider rewriting this poem so it shouts as a testiment to all who read -- PURPOSE! I wanna see (show-me) what your line #4 is telling (don't-tell) me. I believe there is more to be birth in this poem. Push "purpose" rather then tell me, let it blossom before our eyes.
This is a good start but I believe there's more to tell from the depth of your heart, soul and spirit. Let "purpose" sing! |
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| Beautifully written. |
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Comment by: manoj - 2007-04-13 02:48
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| very well expressed... liked. |
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Comment by: AprylKV - 2007-03-16 09:55
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| Wow. Usually I have some critique of some sort to give, but this was perfectly written, truthful and intriguing. Wonderful, stupendous writing. |
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