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forbiddenangel
Stephanie Ferrell
United States, Indiana, Crown Point

Words: 193
Access: Public
Comments: 4

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Suicidal Season

Suicide Season This is my suicide season,A part of my pain put on display, You're never here for me, Cleaning out our closet tonight. I walk outside, In the freezing snow, Trying to send this pain below, Suicide season enfolds me in its arms. Give me a razor, Sharp as your lies, But when it comes down to it, I'm completely paralyzed. I cry on the sidewalk, Nowhere to go, My falling tears freeze, Right on my pale face. Can this really be true? Can it be? That I'm falling out of love with you? I had a Dream about You I had a dream about you last night, And in it everything was all right, I said I love you and you held me close, And you didn't care about my ghosts. I don't want to be alone on my birthday, I just wanna hear say ' everything is okay,' I don't want you to be alone forever, I just want us to be together. I had a dream about you last night, And we were all right, I closed my eyes, And said good night.

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Comments  
CINDYANNE99 Comment by: CINDYANNE99 - 2007-03-05 18:01
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This was a great read, felt so real. :-) Many Prop's :D
BumpSkillz Comment by: BumpSkillz - 2007-02-26 14:59
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Nice poem, but the form seems extremely... sloppy. Did you mean for each line start below to previous line like most poetry? It looks like you wrote it that way but then stuck each line back-to-back like a standard prose paragraph. The punctuation and capitalization of letters doesn't seem to imply that you wrote it the way its shown here. Did the formatting mess up? I think that is all that ruins this one for me. Otherwise, it's nice. You might want to fix that though...
Comment by: - 2007-02-26 14:38
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wow, that's really good. I feel like that a lot....
Iniquity Comment by: Iniquity - 2007-02-17 09:17
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...I never expected anything like this from you, Step...but this isn't really one of your best works, and I know you have much better than this.

Knowing you, this was...kinda devoid of emotions, and that's so unlike you...so...just improve this slightly, mm'k?

Love ya, girl.
1

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