Ecstasy...
All the energy of a bottomless gas tank ten past empty...
You said we had no cigarettes no chewing gum no taxi home pretty fucked you said...

Gums tight and bled for boredom...
the sulphur of a soul burnt out right to the end...
fingers stained yellow and stink of tobacco...
the last chaotic crash of waves around the corner...
Endless energy and the fire still hungry...
hopelessly seeking ecstasy or anything...
fidgeting and chewing...

chewing the fixtures... chewing the fittings... chewing the furniture... chewing the faces of passing strangers...
shouting at them demanding light... or change for the cigarette machine... chewing and grinding anecdotes..
the muttering diatribe... chewing the evening alive... chewing the conversation... chewing the doorman...
chewing the car park... chewing the horizon... chewing the stars and all the night air and gum.

(...vomiting by the lake...)

There are strange countries over the water, static and drowsy with the first deft touch of normal...
I reached out and touched the surface - great listless mirror of unbiased something-or-other...
It is so hard to remember I am alive under the water...
Still shaken from some premonition of my own death in the toilets...
When I sent out for the priest, a joss stick a glass of firewater...
I took last orders and everything this time it was rather serious...
I wasn't fucking...
...and yet...

I am alive and laughing free spirit here under the water,
I gasp and spit and fidget the stern chains of inhibition,
I am Houdini turning his sleight of steel under the frozen river.

The breathless abandon of my spirit, the final quiver of a brain letting go,
Tearing down the last barricade to loosen my mind and come up for air
The new air of a clear and perfect vision of the night
...
no robes of conscience come between my tingling body and the million throbbing hearts of the pure joy machine ecstasy chemical through soft skin, an evening resplendent in perfect possibility mind contorts a thousand thoughts as one Dionysian symphony... these are the thoughts of a universe that has for it's meaning the most blissful nothing the infinite empty joy of being the leaping spark of electricity a static charge on my spine. Step into the light!

Blue skinned boy the night is yours,
No light escapes your blooming eyes,
No darkness damages your cause,
No fire takes your soul alive.

Until your spirit stumbles,
And your reason comes undone,
At ward time when you tremble,
On the gurney hour of dawn.

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