The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
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Poetry >> The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
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The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Drives an El Camino with expired Texas plates
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Sells happiness thirty bucks an eighth
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Builds bombs brewed from soap and orange juice
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Smokes Bidis on the corner waiting for the schoolbell to ring
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Pulled you credit report and dived into your dumpster
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Builds silencers out of 2 liter Coke bottles, cotton balls, and duct tape
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Picks his teeth clean with an unbent paper clip
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Owns a Bible autographed by Jim Jones
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Can quote the Walker Diaries and Soul on Ice at will
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Gives no credit since the bank doesn't ply his wares
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Sleeps eight hours a week
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Drives down your block admiring your lawn
The man in the Hawaiian shirt and mirrored sunglasses
Is coming to collect and he never takes no for an answer
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| I like this. I disagree Baxter and Graci, the poem would lose a lot of its power without the constant repetition. |
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Comment by: Baxter - 2006-07-06 08:06
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| I have to agree with another poster - I read it twice once as written, then I skipped the bit about the man and I liked it much better, I will read your other stuff. You are very gritty I like that! |
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| Repetition is nice, but maybe this is too much... I think maybe you should combine some of the lines/ thoughts to break it up. Some of the details are fine!, but the monotony of it is too much for me. |
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| nice |
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"June 2007 - Skive Magazine"
This issue is guest edited by A.G. Bennett and contains 24 short stories from some of the world's most exciting authors including: G. Thomas Sawyer, Martin Green, Jill Baggett, Michael Pelc, Charles Langley, Will Riley, T.R. Healy, Philip Loyd, L.B. Sedlacek, Wayne Scheer and many more.
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