I plopped in front of the TV eating my crappy microwave dinner. I switched on to the E! channel and Rain Man was being shown. It starred Tom Cruise and Dustin Hoffman in his stellar Oscar winning performance. I could not bring myself to watch the ending of the movie. First, I saw it already for  8 to 9 times as a staple requirement in my graduate school and second, it hurts me to remember a friend who has a "rain cloud". I never had the chance to say goodbye for I was in a very painful and confusing situation in my life. In one of these rare times, I become selfish and I bolt out when I see that the person I thought had affection for me was the very first person to laugh at my New York Dream alongside with his whole family. But not this person, he may be a part of that family but he was different. They viewed him as a liability, a mistake and a disgrace for all of them are "perfectly functioning" individuals. When I first met him, I just dismissed him as one of those odd people since I am used to dealing with people with special needs on a regular basis. It was until one of the workers in the school told me he has autism and he is "crazy." I  wanted to correct her but I guess it was useless at that point. What started with him carrying a big box of books to my room continued to almost four years of learning with him, I became his feisty advocate, ready to bust somebody's head if they make fun of him. In return, he was my constant source of laughter and a bodyguard. I mean, who would try to mess with me when I am with a big, burly guy? In a city that is a port for illegal substance, a single lady living alone can be a red flag for danger. He would wait for me each morning at the school gate and when I get off the jeepney, he would stop traffic so I can cross safely. I think he is ten times a gentleman and at the end of work, he would escort me back to my apartment. This is his favorite time since we will share a pack of cigarettes and wait for the fishball man. We would talk nonsense and laugh like kids. Most of the time, I have a confused look since he will repeat a sentence five times and he would change a topic in a split second. He is three years older than me but he looked up to me like a teacher and his best friend. One afternoon, I invited him to have a snack at Mc Donald's. He hesitated and I asked him the reason. He responded that he never came to such place much less inside a restaurant. I felt my blood boiling thinking of his family. His mother who prides herself as coming from a "Buena de Familia" (she did not like me since I did not come from one), his brother who always called him gago (stupid) and alas my ex boyfriend who just makes fun of him since this is the only thing he is good at. In front of Mc Donald's, I coached him how to order food. I watched from a distance in case he forgets a step. I was so proud of him as he ate his Big Mac meal. Then I taught him how to hold a spoon, a fork and knife properly; talk slower so people can understand him and not be afraid to ask when he needs help. From then on, he almost never had any problem buying, ordering or talking with people (most of the time, I give him a list just in case). One Christmas, he gave me a big heavy box. He said he earned it by cleaning his grandmother's room. I opened it and I smiled when I saw a silver Zippo lighter and an ashtray as big as a boulder. I thanked him while cursing to myself since I swore off smoking since I was having difficulty sleeping already. It became the center piece on my table. I bought him an orange shirt with a capital P for Prison. He loved the shirt and had been bugging me for months. One night, out of sheer frustration in gratitude to his brother, I tagged him to play pool with me. It was the funniest night of my life with him knocking each ball off the table and unintentionally poking people. He readily apologized and I saw pissed but scared faces. We played like there was no tomorrow and we had the whole place to ourselves since everyone left out of fear of his strength. Not all days are good for us. There are times, he gets on my nerves since he has this habit of fixing my table, lining up my books according to size and color and in the process I will lose important papers. He reasoned that I was a slob and that I should keep my table neat. It drove me nuts when he dismantled my Dinosaur because he saw that the pieces were not numbered in order. I desperately explained that there is a model to follow but of course, I lost the case. To piss his family more, I pushed that he be given a simple job in the school. One that will pay him and make him feel useful. As expected, they gave him a job in my class as my "assistant." It surprised me that he was good with kids and they loved him since he acts like them. They would climbed all over him while I check the homework. My room was the cleanest and every holiday, he would put up decorations with much glee. One holiday, he overdid it and the room looked like a cheap pub house with too much lights. I showed him how to use the computer especially not to bang the keyboard and he taught me to listen to Wolfgang and Eminem. In time he became an ally, listening when I complained about his brother and he would make me crack up when he would imitate how I cursed. He saw how my heart was being broken and he even said that I do not deserve his brother. He proved it to me on an afternoon drive with my ex. As always, we ended up arguing and screaming at each other. To offend me more, he would drive recklessly to make me scared. That time, I just snapped and I put my foot down on the gas pedal and shouted, "You want to die, go ahead and it will all be your fault, asshole!" He pulled over and the next thing was just a blur to me. All I can recall was my ex being strangled on the driver seat. I told my friend to stop. I will never forget his words."You try to do that again to Hazel, I will kill you even if I am your brother, you are more stupid than me." We stayed quiet the whole time and my ex never did that again. His family hated me because I empowered him. He was much vocal and even expressed wanting to go back to school. They never listened, just ignored him and only summons him when they need to lift a heavy load. One weekend, he was scolding their workers to be quiet because I stayed up until 3 in the morning finishing my ex's thesis. When he met him at the door, he just said "Gago! Hazel finished your papers and you don't even care if she has eaten."

I left the school because of personal reasons. There were nasty gossips like I was pregnant, his older brother called me unstable, immoral and my ex was nowhere to be found. I guess he was under his mother's skirt all the while and only came out when he learned I was bound for he Big Apple. In that city, I have been through hell but I learned 80 % of life's lessons and 50 % of that, I owe it  to my friend with a "rain cloud."

The fondest memory I have of him is that we both love watching clouds up above the sky and we play this game of guessing what they look like.One time he pointed to one and told me it looked like a big dick. I almost choked on my fishball and laughed so hard. I glanced at it and yeah, it did look like one.