The place for writers:
Upload your writing in minutes, receive peer feedback from other writers, poets, authors, then get your work published out there in the real world. Learn how other writers are doing it. |
|
 |
 |
 |
| |
Mind of a Twinkie
You're fat, and ugly
a pure disgrace.
Shameful bitch,
you leave no trace.
Shove those Twinkies in your mouth,
thats all your worth,
as you sit and pout.
You're nothing, pathetic, stupid, insane.
You lie; you cheat, as you place the blame
On the people around you watching you cry,
continue to drink the liquor that lapsed your pride.
Scum, sinner, yeah highlight your life,
with those two jelly rolls you hide in the night.
To maintain all the sadness that collapsed your heart,
Go ahead, roll over, eat the last sweet tart.
Don't waste our time with scheming little plans,
As you, make friends with the Joneses'
Don't forget to wash your hands.
Keep talking to yourself,
Like that will help one thing.
Just go grab one of those,
Cream-filled stuffed rings.
Want to comment on this Poetry?
Sign up to Edit Red and you will be able to comment on Poetry and get access to: Upload your own stories and poems, get readers and their feedback, promote your work...
|
 |
|
[Back to top]
|
|
 |
Comment by: - 2006-03-17 09:43
|
|
| It was a hard look at a person who had serious issues with food and excuses for everything. They had given up and indulged to their hearts content and have become what they are a sad fat excuse. |
|
|
| LMAO I do not know whether or not you intended this to be funny, but you really had me going. Good work. Ron |
|
Comment by: - 2006-02-21 01:10
|
|
I will be honest in saying that I took the poem literally -- eating too much, no self-control etc. The more I think about it, though, and reading other posts, I began to think about other indulgences like drugs. The emotion was clear, though. Great job in showing that.
Marc |
|
Comment by: - 2006-02-17 13:33
|
|
Geez...
I almost choked on my swiss roll reading that!
Good emotion... You felt what you were writing, that's for certain! |
 |
Comment by: shaft - 2006-02-08 04:37
|
|
I like it! If that means anything.
Such anger in it, is it self-referential? The food thing is very topical what with all the talk of obesity etc. It works for me, a disgust with fat people, 'leave no trace', vapid consumers.
The idea that food works as a metaphor I like. Keeping up with the Joneses' could be peer pressure if its an addiction. Wanna be cool then you have to be friends with them and then it makes the addiction harder.
The most interesting line for me was 'Don't forget to wash your hands'. There's the literal after food, the casting off of others, washing your hands of them. The act of washing hands removes all traces so it might be someone in denial. Gota love poetry, the more you read it the more meanings there are.
I've never had a Twinkie but I'd like one, although slightly less now. :-) |
| 1 2 Next |
|
|
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
| | Advertising - Terms & Conditions - Short Story Submissions - Contact - Writing Competitions - Writing Links - Book Promotion - Sky-Tribe.com - alanemmins.com |
|
|
|
|
| |
Member short stories, poems, comments and other contributions are owned by the poster.
Copyright 2003 - 2007 Edit Red I/S | | |
