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Dragon's Breath
I'm standing in front of a fire-breathing dragon.
The steel armor that I'm wearing
is turning into aluminum foil and melting.
I need an alchemist to get things back to normal.
I'm vulnerable against this pyromaniac
in love with hating life yet fearing death.
We're playing hot potato with my emotions,
since it's easier to just ignore the sadness.
My sword hasn't been sharpened in 4,000 years
because it was cursed and stuck rusting in a rock,
somewhere perfect like Camelot.
I want to get out of this medieval tale
before I'm sucked in as the flames gasp for air.
My neck is cramping under the weight of this helment,
but it's shielding my face from the dragon's breath
and only words stop the blisters from forming on my skin.
Lullabies calm the agitation and pain inside me.
Inside the dragon's smoky breath I can hear clearly,
but I can't see from behind this blurry mask.
I feel more like a damsel in distress
than a knight in this crumbling foil.
I don't want to be a hero.
I just want enough corage to slay this beast.
If this is a dream then let me wake up,
Find myself in my pajamas in my bed
and let me go back to sleep with my eyes open.
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| I loved the first two paragraphs and then my interest wavered a little bit. The Excalibur reference was great with the exception that I don't think that Excalibur can become dull. But its been awhile since I have messed with the whole Arthurian Legend mumbo-jumbo so I could very well be wrong on that one. Still I enjoyed the post-modern flavor of the first two paras |
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Comment by: - 2007-03-05 10:53
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| I dunno, skettio, this one didn't really agree with me. I like the idea, just the way it's written is a bit like... like you can't decide if you want to write a formal rhyming thing or freeverse. I understand that it's difficult to choose because you're using the image of a medieval myth/fairytale thing which calls for a formal style, but you're still very much writing a personal accounting of painful emotions, which might work better with freeverse. |
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I agree, good storytelling. Some good imagery too. Well done.
C |
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I love how this poem tells a story.
You really captured the knight in shining armour scene quite well.
the second last stanza was my fav. |
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Comment by: suleem - 2007-03-04 16:37
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| great write, love the dragon inuendo's. the only spell mistake is courage (corage) |
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