writing community
Sign In Here | Lost Password | FREE Sign Up
E-mail: Password:
Remember login  
The place for writers:
Upload your writing in minutes, receive peer feedback from other writers, poets, authors, then get your work published out there in the real world.       Learn how other writers are doing it.

 
Sasa
Lisa Smith
United States, Tennessee, New Market

Words: 898
Access: Public
Comments: 2

Forward to a friend
Print Version
E-mail this writer E-mail this user 
View Author profile
Add to Readers  




Valentine

She stood alone in a crowded room. In her hands she clasped tightly her heart. It was bloody and wounded, bandages covering bandages, dirty now. Still clasped in her hands this pitiful thing wounded by this thing we call life. She held it tightly, not allowing anyone to see... protecting it with all her might. It had been neglected, broken, stabbed, and carelessly tossed about. No, she would never let anyone see her most prized posession. Not ever again.
He walks up to her...very kind he seems. He sees the dirty bandages dripping with blood. "What have you there," He asks. "None of your business" she says He smiles and walks away.
Now at home she stands in the kithcen staring out the window tears streaming down her face, "All I wanted was someone to love me...to care...to always be there." She steels herself. Dries her tears,unable to live she still clasps on to her bandaged heart. The most prized of all her posessions. A knock comes from the kitchen door and she quickly makes herself presentable. Opening the door she recognizes the man from the night before.
What are you doing here?
I noticed your yard...seems that everything is dying.
She peers around Him seeing the death that has has become her garden.
So why are you here? She demands.
I am a gardner you see, and I thought you may need some help. I can bring it back to life.
Yes, she responds. I've been too busy guarding my heart to accomplish the gardening that needs to done.
Would you be willing to pay me to bring back the beauty I can see was once here?
She thinks about it for a moment, and finally says yes. They settle on a price, and he begins his work.
Each day she stands at the window watching The work as it is done. Watching as fruit bearing trees, many types of flower, and lush looking bushes replace the death that was once her yard.
He knocks on the door she answers it still clasping her ragged heart.
Looks like your finished, making a feeble attempt at a smile.
Not quite He says. He looks at her and smiles with eyes that seem to pierce her soul.
What more is there to do?
He smiles and walks away never asking for his payment.
The next morning as she stands vigil at the window, clasping her broken heart. She opens her hands slightly to just take a peek. Suddenly there is a knock at the door. She once again tightens her grip on what should be her heart, and answers the door.
The yard is beautiful there is nothing left for you to do.
Oh but there is he says as reaches out to wipe her tear stained face with its hard lines and fear. I'm a handy-man as well. I will do repairs on your house.
Unsure of what to say...She agrees, and He smiles and leaves.
The next day instead of standing vigil at her window...she wanders through the house as he makes one repair after another. Leaving in his wake perfection to replace the desolation of neglect. This goes on for a few months and finally the house is complete.
As he is readying himself to leave, She says you know I never payed you for the yard, and you never asked for payment for all the reapairs you've done on my house.
Putting His tools away...He says "My dear, the price has already been paid."
She doesn't quite know what to think of that, surely there must be something she can do for this kind man. So she asks.
What can I give you in return for all you have done for me? He looks at her clasped hands, and asks, "May I please have a look?" She is frightened, No terrified, but this man has been so kind. She holds her ragged heart close and then reaches out opening her hands to give him full view. He didn't run. Only cried and as he lifted her heart from its protected place he begins to remove the old dirty bandages. The tears like medicine wash it clean. This tattered broken heart becomes a jewel of perfection. No longer neglected.
He holds out his hands with this precios jewel cupped inside. He reaches out to give it back...
Her face now radiant... all the harsh lines removed. She says no you keep it. You take much better care of it than I ever could. He goes to his truck, and she wonders is this it? Will he return. Suddenly he appears again through the door carrying an ornately beautiful hand carved box. He places it on the mantle for all to view and in it He gently places her heart, a most exquisite jewel. He turns to her, and she asks, "why have you done all this for me?"
2000 years ago I gave up my life and made a payment for you so that I could show you true love, and you could learn to love me. So that wounded hearts could be made new.
He smiled, and this time he stayed.


I Corintians 13...Love never fails.

Sasa Smith

copyright 2007 Allrights reserved

Want to comment on this Short Stories?
Sign up to Edit Red and you will be able to comment on Short Stories and get access to: Upload your own stories and poems, get readers and their feedback, promote your work...
Sign up






[Back to top]
Comments  
Sasa Comment by: Sasa - 2007-04-06 16:06
Add to Readers
      
Thanks, I appreciate your comment. This was a first try, on a short story. Wasn't real sure about it, so your help is appreciated.
TommyTaylor Comment by: TommyTaylor - 2007-03-28 09:17
Add to Readers
      
Good job on this story. Now for some criticism. You need to add the quote marks to make it easier to read. The story flows well and I enjoyed how you used the metaphors that you have. Did not think that you needed to use the sentence with the wooden box, but that is just me. I But as I said in the beginning, good job on this story.
1

Sponsored Ads


By Sasa

Featured Writers

Advertising - Terms & Conditions - Short Story Submissions - Contact - Writing Competitions - Writing Links - Book Promotion - Sky-Tribe.com - alanemmins.com
  Member short stories, poems, comments and other contributions are owned by the poster.
Copyright 2003 - 2007 Edit Red I/S