"Aint got no soul, the nearly inspired version"
I wrote this while I was waiting for my turn at court yesterday. I got hooked up at court, but still I wrote this. I think I was thinking of the beat to "Loser" by Beck. I was thinking that there is not anything except trying to make money off of another's material that is actually stealing music. That is what a cover is!

"Aint got no soul, the nearly inspired version"

The name of the few
can't be one if you can't love hate (That goes both ways)
who'se ever heard of a mole
rappin like a black man
and I aint got a soul

There's noise in a bush
but where's the melody?

Cuz no one's got a gun
that was made in their own funky B (My cousin Robert used to call me B)
There's a man whose face is left off the mall
I am tired of my own ways but my girl leaves me cuz I can't recall

This is so profound my own breakthrough I haven't found
I aint got no soul they punished my wipes and got proof of their own troll
I'm afraid of knowles and my guitar left for foil cuz my stomach tried to change the world

"You can't change what doesn't exist," "isn't that what I just said?"
2 more and I'll die of lol.

I'm laughin bout a hussein man
Kurt hung dolls but he's just a man
If freedom was a choice I'd choose to enfore-
that hunger isn't an excuse to charge overly in this divorce
"I never knew you"
But then the market claimes it gotta right to make double

I guess it's okay, cuz hits on the top of the bat usually cracks the diamond

A cork was found in you.

I used to feel like I had no right to write anything that anyone thought wasn't who they thought I was. Like some of my lyrics used to be raps. Like the "numb tongue syndrome." And I always wanted to write lyrics that were like the Beatles and Nirvana where things had another level. But I felt like I had not proved myself, or had actually gone through anything. And also with that I also felt like I had no position. Like I had never been someone who could talk. Or someone who actually had anything that really related. But most of all I think I didn't feel like I was any kind of person who had the money to put my mouth where my heart was.

Also, let me tell you kind of what this is about. First of all, I am not an anarchist or a communist. But also I would like to say that I am not a capitalist or a democrat. To me democracy doesn't exist, because as soon as people gather together it is a republic. To me communism is like a forced government of what was free in Acts. To me capitalism started around the time of the Civil war. I am not a racist either but I am not so sure that the Civil was was started so much to free African Americans. As it was to make sure that the country didn't split. When the industrial age took off which I do think was a while before the Civil war, I think that capitalism was starting to come in. Now capitalism to me is like that game where people have a bat and they start with their hands at the bottom, and then whoever gets their hand on the top wins. Which means that there is always losers. Now also to me capitalism is like, "I am going to make money off of you, but that doesn't matter, because you can make money off of someone else." I don't really have much to say about republics. I guess they are trying their best with what they have. I had this thing I was going to use if the time ever approached and I could get away with it. Like, "Oh, I am sorry, I try to make a profit wherever I go." Or like, "With whatever I do." The line the Nearly Inspired Version comes from what I heard some people call the NIV translation of the Bible. I was reading in a Nirvana biography that Kurt had an apartment I think sometimes before Nevermind, and he hung dolls from the ceiling. Ummm, I got busted for stealing a piece of cornbread and some Mamba candy from a Market. You know really if anyone wants to get into it. Where do rights comes from? If they don't come from God, then I can do whatever I want. And if they don't come from God, but everyone wants peace well then that turns into not real freedom, kind of like what we have now, because then all anyone has to do is say that they are offended, or that someone is bugging them; and then I can't go on. And then in the Bible it says to let the poor man steal to fill his stomach. And then it goes on to say though that if he is caught he will pay the full penalty. But what religious people don't realize is that that doesn't say that it is right. I was homeless for a while. I don't really want to puff anybody up, but I mean being homeless isn't like the end all be all of like someone's failures.

"Listening"
I had this dream and I spoke; miriads of olives and I actually wrote.
Control came- this is not the end
My whole frame.

I hear the sound of engines running
My mind satisfied as dew in the morning.

My worst fear, my biggest enemy- that I would refrain.

Because the only thing I can remember is what I almost threw away.

Why do I feel like I want to be on top- and while I am here: why does it take pain for me to reach the love that is so sincere?

Here in the clouds I never fall
But when I see my skin I can't even stop withdrawls

Here is the point- my own blood to me is a pint.

If only the doors were open, I woudn't have to move first.

But what do I do if they all commence and I thirst?

Why does my head feel like oil when all I wanted to do was to turn Nirvana into spoil.

I want to proclaim, I want to say, I want to serve for there to be a today.

My own deodorant it crumbles my room. And any kind of movement and I'll agree I can't move.

If I had a paintbrush it would be loyal. And if I had maintenance I would break out of this into the light and colors of reflective soil.

Every color in white but I can't love it's coil. Instead of s spring I see another thing to get caught in and be in turmoil.

If I had my own spirit I wouldn't be so noisome. But then again if I had my own breath I wouldn't introduce tomorrow.

That's just it- if I did I wouldn't buy at the Sales of Garage Inc.

But I would work from home, and not spend any money on ink.

I could see the stars without guilt, and no doubt also build a telescope that can't be built.

As long as no one called me 'some thrill.' I could either rest or chill whether I'm eating or still- because it doesn't matter: as long as I know myself.

"Magarette and Megan, my pearls"
In the middle of a daydream I awoke. Your own sonnet was in your heart.

Leaving your mother's arms with no remorse. And it occurred to me: I also had remorse.

So I made my way to you, frightened and fearful we still succeeded.

Your own love you put on me as a necklace, I opened up to you, even the rags.

I was so afraid, you neglected even yourself (In a bad way).

Then you kissed me; I could not refrain. I allowed you to come in, away fell my pain.

(God) You opened up my heart and spoke: "I will give you an everlasting love song."

I replied: "Give it Lord."

Upon the mountains, they smoked. Daisies and lily valleys I wrote. Everlasting in the arms of a queen.

In a vineyard, unseen.

Quiet we lay together undisturbed, waters cascaded down upon us- in the arms of our King.

No fear of loss for our Husband redeemed.

Enlightenment, full of faith
a moment non quenched
Alive and remaining
we went up by breath

Who has heard such thing
The arms of the Lord has dealt bountifull with us.

Arise my love, my goddess (The Bible calls us elohims), my queen: to a vineyard unknown and a room like a ravine.

Loftiness took us up
Pillars of precious things
A pavilion for you my queen
A temple for Us postweaned

There is no fear in Love, brought to me
On wings of gold and sapphires gleamed

And there was nothing unclean.
A star broke, just at the break of day, and our hearts stole away

The brown hair you have tells me you love me and I was not ashamed. Beauty of an immortal, skin as clay.

The sea: Where is it? But our rivers flow like crystal; clearer than May.

The only one I've felt eternal love for looked me in the eye, and I see hers and they tell a story to me: recited in honest verse: "There is no fear in love" they say, and I move closer to hear her say:

"Don't neglect the gift that is in you" and I imagined it was hers.

"There is no fear in love" I say so I breathed another verse:
"When my stomach heeds Peter's words (1 Peter 5:10) I assume we'll already be in the time of love."

A Visitor came and called us His friend and said, "First you must have the time of life."

'Sure'�
What would you do? If it mattered didn't matter. for you to win or lose?

My whole thing, is that if it's got guts then it makes it in the end.

Because I know I can justify. I can lift my head into the sky and stay there until the night is bright.

Because I own the world and it's atoms.

I call the shots and I live it up like I was mad at ya.

No one ever explained that you could win when you lose and lose the pain.

That's how I walk. And yet then why does it take me to forget that for it to work?

Sorrow and puns and out of the sun, too bright to behold; I can only see the way it shaves off the grey.

I guess that's the thing with light. I have to be in it to win it. Cuz otherwise then it's only to cast off what is trite.


'Falling Bibles'�
Truth don't call it security. Because all it takes is one look, and the whole of what you want takes on a whole nother look.

Because I want to lose it all. If I can't have back that one moment where it all...

Surprised, and then the end. Existence, my only friend?

I got this gift you see that makes me feel.

I get so many things at once, and they all are together like my kneel.

This and that and some of this and that. Pretty soon I am born because I did what I loved, and I brought something into the full.

Pretty much I think this is the last I will make.

Because I did it all for a rose, and really that's all it takes.

As long as you don't not come to me cuz I can't get it back.

Jade isn't led into things except where there is no need for slack.

The beam in her eyes, I don't care if her own life grew and she left this sight.

Really, one more time, if you don't look, I mean right now and here, physically and not for this book.

So I guess I will leave, and have nothing to breath. Because to me it doesn't matter if I leave and then it all ends up takin by the breeze.

If I can't have that one second back, then to me really, it all to me; I will throw it all away because I am the last who doesn't care really.

I think I said it all and still I digress. Because to me I think I could have it all because I know I do my best.

Open honesty defamed religion casting off Bibles; and the end is something not worth living. If hope were a blanket I would be poor and naked. But on the outside, not like those who don't care if-

'It was meant to be' 'meant to be.'

No one invited me. My dreams would and could have...
we would and could have...
There is no future for the woman who wears a hat.

I have no such notion, but I think that you and my heart have forever lost emotion.

Forever is a pretty strong word, at least I said it was pretty and was not a part of something that took the word from the world.

One 'l;' that's a pretty weak way to love. Cuz when I think about you, I perfectly and imperatively thank Him in heaven above.

I swear if you don't. I won't stay here so that you can tote..some small life like..wrapped up in excercise.

You would leave me and then you would run and try to live on my own love which you have made a pun, not my hun; but your own ways and days which you sold for nerotic candy strippers cuz the only thing you see is all that your parents tried to keep ya, from the last one who would actually bring some price to something that was overly cautious and lividly dying of strife (lots of work, lots of loss).

If only I had a gun, I wouldn't need it because I would use my own love to tear apart the things that have us kept us here like this.

There's a bridge in the door, and I hate to call you a whore, but what else is a woman who only cares about spending the loving which comes naturally. The only thing I can say is that you wanted to use me.

I can see that I have taken the blame, for the exact thing which you have ran away with.

This verse, this dyin-lect, sure if you leave I won't lose but that's only because I have inside of me, all that will stand your rules.

I hate you with a passion that my love will never cast away.

I will only feed it and breed it because hey- can't you see? I am walkin' my life just like you say.

It's just too bad that you don't see, that you don't read, that you don't pick up the phone let alone the books I left for you happily.

To me everything is a step, but to get to what isn't just heart sap.

So I guess this is it. It's what you made. Either I don't come to you, or you don't come to me. Cuz you have wanted this to end even before the beginning. Cuz if I come you still try to undermine me; and if I go you wanta hold it over my head that I didn't mind your sleeve.

Charms, emotions, something out of nothing, I can see; that you don't actually have the thing that makes it really free.

All you want, and all you care for; is that you are able to tell me that 'you can if your familiar,' and 'you can't because your near.'

I am not the low and my high is right. It is you I have found to be the one prolonging the night.

Remember? It was the day that stood still, until all was fulfilled.

So I guess this is it, again. You're the only one who is to blame in the end. And I don't care anymore about your heart. Because you sold it so that you coudl teach me to never part.

I will prepare with care these vessels of mine, and I will sell my life for a dime. And I will offer it in, to five piece sense.

I have done it before, Jade then I gained all the more.

And I won't and didn't do it with anything less, or anything added in; as if love needed a reason cuz all you want is the same in the end.

Two five piece cents, do you know what that means? It means that no matter what I do I will win every single piece.

Now, now matter what you do it's all for the hope. Which you wanted to cast off because your parents taught you 'the truth about dope.'

"If it is of the heart, then you should test, because you're better than the rest of them, because we let you earn a meal plan."

All I know is that no matter what I win, and you can't say a thing. Because I loved and didn't entertain, that the heart is a pipe dream.

So whether you live or die, I will reap and thrive.

And you will know the reason, when your norepinephrine both fades away slowly and burns out bright.

In a moment, in a twinkling of an eye. See I am not even thinking about you anymore.

And it is all because of 'I.'

'Livin' to die, ohwoah, easy and light; from the pillars to beyond the sky'�
If you care at all, this wouldn't be the end, but a new beginning where you actually didn't take my love and stay.

I swear you're only after what mom and dad say.

But it's okay because they hold a building, and keep you from me; now what is worse? That they keep you from me or give you away stealing my verse?

One tie and you run away. Like you were never taught to look up during the day. Maybe it can't be taught, and I'm just trippin. All of this seems so sudden, and that's why and how, and so I dive in flippin.

What's the use, when all you want, is not to want, cuz you want to flaunt.


Ray, doesn't seem like a name to me; that actually comes from the sun but it's gonna turn red one day.

Mrs. brings knifes to the back; as if she actually knew or held anything, that was anything but black.

You think I care? That you don't and won't forgive?

It's all the same to you; whether I die or live.

I meant what I said, and what I left. You won't find me; it'll be some teeth and tears that still won't be about me.

You wanta start something, and I wonder if you even read, anything that I said that you did

And wrong is not your friend. (That's me by the way).

It's (Wrong) your lover, and it's an orgy.

All for one and one for some complacent simplicity.

I can rhyme and I can flow, and I can capture

the things keepin' em from below; so we can have perfect nature.

Who's inside, and who's the one. Who'll leave you when it's all done?


If I had one more chance I would heed Paul this time, and be just as he was, instead of this 'per chance.'

You all have emptied me, of every dream and every beam.

I can't explain, I can't express what it feels like to be on the outside of your dress.

You will know, you will see, when outer to you, turns into massive gravity.

And I'll just walk away. I'll proclaim. Love to me is all I see. That's what it takes to be a man.


Jealousy, you haven't seen, cuz you all sow so that you cause it to come upon me. But you will see.

That is why, you're against the tide, and can't be brought into paradise.

Just like that, cuz you never were; no you never were; it wasn't you. It's what you chose.

I never lose, didn't you know; oh then why'd you plan like I would've showed

Something that you couldn't hose.

It's all here, it's all there; neither cold nor hot; nothin like hearin I'm not, good enough to be worth enough for you to be hot. (For and to me)

Weather now you leave or stay. I know when it'll be clearer than May, but it won't you oh babe.

My mind it's got intricacies; you wanted and you didn't wanta give me a chance and then call the Police.

You coudn't even say one thing, it was all up in the air you said, "You wouldn't mind if I had a pair."

You wouldn't mind but you had to be clear...

that you wouldn't mind, but I need more than that, no that's not fair.

Whose to blame, well let's forget about that, because in my dreams it's really truth that neither of us chose to be here.

But I can't refrain from telling you babe, that that doesn't mean that I'm a what's the word that comes before slave?

And I still gotta say that it doesn't mean that you'll get away. So how's it gonna be?

You want to weep and gnash your teeth?

Or do you want to come, and have it be for us, and God who wants it as pure as dust when they were keepers of flowers and love?

Who told you no? That you couldn't sow, when it's all about who you know?

I have grown I aint the same; the same man you saw in the eleventh grade. When you my..just a few more seconds baby and I'd a had you but you couldn't wait. It's you parents again, they gave you away, to what doesn't fill the stomachs wake.

I wrote my own and you didn't receive, that I wanted you in every purity, so now it's come that you're Ebin, but I gotta tell you now my life's arranged, so don't you come and try to say...

That you would've if ya thought I wouldn't have traded ya for some pot, like 'that's all ya had to say.'

And I would have got away with it, if it wasn't for these here kids; who you went to instead of mae.

One more thing I gotta say, see do you know what it means when His power's proclaimed, it means "Cruise over we don't need a date."

I'll love you till I die, it don't matter like if I cry; why don't you just see that you'll always be the apple of my eye. Just don't take my basket and leave.

I love you for what I am not, and I don't care what I don't got; all I know is that's all you see.

Glasses don't make you see, when you're living like that's really me.

So in my prime I'll take my life. And I'll go out like it's the trumpets last height. As long as I have come to see His face.

The temple my love you have to see; that everytime you even think you'll leave; it's all destroyed and He won't give no remedy.

So if ya really thought; that it was about ma' heart; then you'd know it wasn't me.

If you ain't got no battle scars, means you ain't past, past Marah. Now tell me you see.

The only way to look that good is when you only try to not have what's good. Because you think your life is found in refrain.

Bradley, and Cobain

they woke up one day and wouldn't live the same.

It's like this you gotta know; aint nothin right and aint nothin no, but that's when you really go.

You wanna use my pint and then tell me when I die it's fine cuz of what has come to be the greater good.

You don't know you don't understand that nothin actually...

I have Big Salty Tears; but I'd be there at the drop of a pin.

Now don't you see, don't ya wanta breath, and say to to unbelief: next window please? But I mean for love cuz it ain't wrong our flower does please.

'Melody Medley'�
"My place, is not a home. Don't make no difference, but I have found. That I nee..he-ed a place to stay. I don't listen to what the landlord man say."

"It's like this and that and like this and uh."

"It's been a real long, real long time."

"I am Jamaican but I aint no freak...every he see them you fulfill the danger."

"A funky not a junky but I know where to get it."

It's just that sometimes I see, that I am in the dark but you won't catch me. Night unto night reveals knowledge, you see in the beginning you see, it meant that it's not been revealed yet that you were always with me.

You know why it fell like that? Because for life it takes that my love is not stirred up or awakened before I please. And how can I please if I don't know good and bad, because the second platform from good to life is that I make a choice. So it was all subjected to futility. So that many would see, that nothin gets by Him, no nothin beats Him. Because immortality and incorruption means just that...

I just can't handle it, when I was and still am gathering for a fire and am bitten by a viper. But I guess I will shake it off in the fire. And that fire now is what is within me.

So when you know you can't lose and you know you can only win only without the rules and regulations. Then it becomes that almost like if I can put it down freely, then I can pick 'it' up freely. So that tomorrow doesn't mean that I went to sleep, and it was all a dream.

I am not sayin that it's about some wrong move; but really if we met and it was about the heart; then really I tell you I couldn't lose.

Want to know what I know? Aphrodite told the world that I can't be fully known. And that woman the one who calls herself...well do you know that she makes it so that we meet and it is all about what is dull.

Commies, and caps, dems and reps? It is all fake so that I need a law to be able to say I love you and go from there.

Independance? That is not my rest. My blood flows in my sleep, so I go on to say; that my rest is that I am never again alone.

I tell you what, when you know it's about the heart, but then you also do something romantic, like walk like that; it gives a whole new meaning to someone saying, "As surely as your soul lives I will not leave you." When he goes on up into the whirlwind. And I was always with you.

Again, I say, that it's not about wrong moves. But if I had a dime for everytime I had no where else to go. Why I would sound like New Song, and end on my plastic bed.

And one more special message to go; if you think about it; what's at the end of Garden Grove?

So if I am going to choose good or bad, first I would make sure that the blood that goes to my head, was from my stomach. Which actually quickens my heart so that I know it's not a business.

'The end'�
If I was to take myself out of someone. I think it would be. That since they had good and bad, that that half of the lump would concede. Because honor and dishonor from the same lump it says. So that an example can be made that it's all about Him.

(And for the love of it did you know what it means that to him who does not have (Buried their talent of love); that even what they have will taken from them. And then to him who has more will be given; and nothing will be lost, except what goes to perdition.)

I have to say, and apart from pride, I mean you would say that you have a thing to side; that there is One who knows who are His, who have always been with Him; because He always is. And to go on really apart from pride, let's remember that if you want to say that it's all by lot, or what was meant to be; that there is One who has that in truth.

So I don't know how to say, to all who come and play; that there is an end, there is a beginning; there is a plan, and there is a meaning. There is a love, and there is a fall; but really why is it so hard to believe that there is One who makes the call?

No offense, and none taken; but if you really want love; why so shaken?

So all are saved you see. And born in love, even through others who come to the sup.

So it is not a menial thing, to make it so that some fall to show majesty. So that a child can see and perceive and know because that is what it takes to be able to grow. If [you] just apply yourself....

And still I got to say all of us really choose our own enemies. And to go from that, in what we don't; if we still don't love; how can we gloat? Because then that is the same, to say that we don't care, if we aren't of those who walk in the day.

'A far more exceeding weight'�
"I couldn't ask for another, oh oh oh oh oh oh."

And so I am in this jail, and like I can't remember if it was true. And then I am like on this island, and I have everything that's in the great blue. And like I have this crown. And I don't care if they take me upside down. And like I have this cloud of dew in the clear heat of sunshine as I say, "You have answered me."

I have to tell you, "I must decrease." And all was fulfilled.

And I have to tell you I am coming down from this mountain, but not one that could not not be touched.

And I have to say that instead of that black hole which was never me; now I have this comfort which redeems.

And what is there for me?

Well let me tell you:

The thorn which would cause all manner of evil desire- gone.

The bonds which would cause me to feel ashamed; have been replace with the bond of peace.

And what do I have to say? Well in no menial way: He and I and you say come.

In a good way: I have nothing but time on my hands, so I mean if my love wants to stay away, that's her thing; if she wants me to speak until that Day; that's her thing; if she wants to absolutely kiss me; that's our thing.

But I have to say: "I have nothing to say, because I am no longer a dj; and if you want to come talk to me, then you gotta talk to my man- daddeeeee!!!!" (Laird)

And mmhmm I saayaayed
i won't wait so long
i said
i won't wait so long for you
oh oh yeah
mmm mmm
ooh oh
hard to get so
much
mmm mmm

I once wrote: "Sometimes I think, I think there's too much in the sink."

And "I wouldn't dance with another oh oh oh oh oh oh."

Yeheeeyah
stop your messing around
ahahah ah
better think of your future
ahahah ah
time you straighten right out
ahahah ah
or youll wind up in jail

uh uh elected
my rhyme's have been perfected
it's obvious as ever
if you're tryin to prevent uh
it can't be compromised

i am a fresh m.c.
as you can plainly see
you won't regret a d.g. a fresh m.c you'll soon agree
so take a seat and feel the beat
of course it is okay uh uh

And I won't have to say-
you only see what you want to believe
when you light up in the back with those tricks up your sleeve.
that don't mean i can't hang
but the day that i die will be the day that i shut my mouth and put down my guitar

Do you got mic control

Don't diss this style (Isn't this the way it's supposed to be [sposed to be now {Crazy fool}]
it's all original

this man, makin money, how i know. it wont be no man of me

got my greatest... got my greatest...

(This is where you come in by the way)

'Adams'�
One time I looked and I thought: "Now why is that so bad?" That's what I want, and it was what was given, so why is it that some want to play in this forest of despair?

I think they just don't like the color of Kurt Cobain's hair.

Cuz you know if they did, they would have to keep up with it like maybe every 2 minutes, and soon they would find that if I wanted to dye my hair with Kool Aid then I have to admit that all of these 'not so pleasant' Dave Grohl faces are really just some help to keep things nice and lukewarm.

I wish I would have a thought of a better word than lukewarm. I use it like every day. I guess I am not that different. Cuz I just wanted to be able to say, "Oh well whatever nevermind." I don't have to worry, he'll get it. He'll understand that Learning to fly really happened because they were friends.

I mean my toys when I was a kid ended up being some kind of space ship. So really being in the cockpit; and not ending up like Jack Black...isn't too far off??

But back to my point, there I go again I swear if Jesus' wans't a Rock I would have to make up some way for THC to not exist. Because rock goes together with stoned. It's just too bad that I had to find out that drugs don't help you be who you want to be when who you wan't to be is someone who doesn't need a catalyst.

But back to my point. Is it really all that bad to wear a differen pair of clothes each day?

So like today I learned something new. Atoms in to the ninth dimension have been found out to have order. But why then is that bombs are made? Cuz the way they are made is that I perceive what may happen if I did this...because if I knew how to see what really positions these things, then I could really make some anarchy.

But back to my point- if I can't create a mock universe, then do you know what? My little experiment won't work. Because when dealing with disorder the only way to know, that my own intentions aren't guiding the results..is to make it so the lab is perfect. Becuase then I could see what causes it.

And then one day it occurred to me: (not what's real and what's for sale)

Alright sorry.

My point- perhaps not being able to find out the law of disorder through a perfect lab. Actually means that there is something going on here that doesn't necessarily mean that my intentions are wrong. Wait, what if the disorder points me to something. Like instead of casting away crowns, what I do is I take a look at that disorder and I let it lead me to the source. Because if I am going to conclude that all is well that ends well and nothingness and blah is my reward; then someone would probably walk up to me and call me a dork.

Because if I just quit after seeing something disorderly I might not actually find what I came here for the first place to see:

But wait I gotta find first, are we building bombs are we Journeying on a sea. Which by the way, no pun intended; but is the same thing as what jets sail on. Not sure if you got that no pun intended. There was no pun, the pun was that I made fun of myself for saying there was one. When it was only there because I put it there.

Well if I am journeying on the sea, then nothing could keep me back from that wind. Because love compels me always to win.

Now...okay so if the country is under God; and I have to start here, then rights come from Him. Which also means then that I can't just walk up to you and like you are just going to like be like yeh I'll marry you.

And then since rights come from God there is something to be seen here. That really since this country actually has it firmly established in it's beginning; that it might not be illegal for me to talk about Him; and have to turn Nirvana into spoil.

You see what had happened was...and then it was like...and then they...and then he...well...why is it that for people to be comfortable that they have to be able to talk over some drabb results from some vain thing?

But anyways my country concludes then that there is one thing which is in charge of everything. And if you don't want to beleive that, then that is fine. But do you know what, you can't infringe on my rights.

I know I know everyone screws up. Otherwise there wouldn't be some kind of thing going on where like I tried (being a little sarcatic here, but I think just maybe if someone can laugh about nothing, I can laugh about something) to like actually say I love you. It's okay it's okay..I know I know ....But hey...I forgot what was I was going to say, dang that was going to funny too; and it was going to like turn my nothingness into like something cool. But here we go again, you know I get sick on anything that goes around and round, but for some reason as long as I am learning something I don't notice. Okay, my point...

Is the whole entire universe just like totally out there man? Where it's just like totally like whoa, like I don't even know.

Wouldn't that be like one all omnicient self existing thing?

Anyways, what if I went the other way and instead of a rose I saw this thing that like that's going to die in a couple of weeks, and a 'Oh my God, what if............................................................................................................."

Okay so I have the right to be able to say legally that God exists definitvely and I am right and whoever disagrees with me can, but they are still wrong, but they can disagree with me if they want to. And by the way, I am not agreeing to disagree. Or should I say agreeing that I want to agree that we all agree.

So what if like this tenth dimension, the perfect lab existed because, when I stretch out the whole entire universe in my hands then yes the things which are dying because of the fall, they do have disorder. But do you know what happens when it gets stretched? Life comes.

And that is how electrons and protons do not just collapse on each other or start to go off on each other. I wonder which one you and I are.

And guess what? No one made them do it. It was all in freewill. That's why this cross thing is so cool. Because Jesus' insides never sinned. And His flesh became every sin.

So after saying these things do you see how I painted a picture? I mean this is how I would talk to my best friend. Because we would still be alive in the end. That's why I love you, not because of me; but because of you.

The way I painted a picture, I forget. You know I highly do not push drugs. I have been up all night, and another pun, do you know what, this is how I feel everyday.

Okay the picture: what I have said evangelism and discipleship is before. It's not that I start wanting people to join me, or I show them how I am up here and [you] are down here. But that do you know what? This little four year old girl taught me that if really loved, I would do it all for you, and with you.

That's what the seed dying means. If I can do that, and don't puff me up. It is a lot easier when you start with nothing, and it is the only thing you have to live.

So what I do for you is I accept you no matter what because of who you are. And what I do with you is that I don't judge or condemn when I get offended. Because if I am offended that means something is wrong with me. Because if I am not happy, I am doing something wrong. So I go to and fro between doing everything with you and doing everything for you: and honestly I don't anyone or anything which or who could have created anything better.

And one more thing: that thing that I wanted: God gave it to me. And what God gave to me: it was that thing I wanted.

'Joking around'�
"This is all ours to sabotage"

"One day I am going to awake and then it is going to be, not even the bad was a bad dream. But that it was never even me."

"If I give my flesh over to death to what is already going to happen, I get a leg up."

"But do you know what else I do, and some people miss this, but Jade taught me to never give up; at the same time, I give the promise."

Because it is about the heart. And guess what else? Only the insides is what is me.

Like when Maverick was flying against Jester and he had to beat him to the bottom. Do you know why the guy chasing the other guy would try to beat him to the bottom? Wouldn't that put him in front of him, and then he would be getting chased? Yes, no. Because if I don't beat it to the bottom what is going to happen is that he can just go off somewhere and I would have no idea where 'it' is. And yes I do beat it to the bottom and am in front of it. Like running faster than someone in a chariot to fruit which is at the opening of the vineyard. And do you know how I beat him there? What concept would have me being able to see myself in the future? He tells me things to come, because I run so fast that I am in the future. And if I do it by heart, then my good is in the future, and I have a treasure where moth and rust can not destroy, and if I complete that race; then it is that I can even have that now; according to what I ran. But since it's about the heart whatever isn't as long as I now run, we were always there.

Feel like I am missing something. But have you guys ever seen Bill and Ted's excellent adventure? Where he says that right now we are going to remember to later go into the time machine and go into the past and get those things that we need; and give them to us at some point before right now; and then....I have it right now! It works both ways: past and future.

'When'�
If my own blood were pouring it would not be taken up.
For the end of all things was at hand but I am just a cup.
Who can stand before a cold that does not exist?
I guess the world wants loss.
The beginning from the end or to play the virgin?
Pain is a miserable thing
Attacking desire unfeigned
Nothingness: the bliss of the nations
What God is made out to be
I would hide my heart, but that is what the world wants
I can't beat it, so join it and call it god?
This is the fire He wishes were already kindled.
I'm not ready for divinity
My own diaphram has been wrenched
I will relieve myself and the world's whip
Jesus crucified Himself
At the end of myself and the end of pain
Pride begins and love refrains

My old man got dressed up
There was not a note
He had done it to himself
He wouldn't presume to tell even the world

Here is something: in looking at this
I have never seen anyone more solemn and genuine
I have once said, "He is not a loser, he loved."
And now I also can see his heart in his own death.

Not to judge but this must be known
That many and most will actually want to sound their throat
But not he, no
He left in victory

Like I have said,
I carry mine; and my boast and win
is that I position myself
concerning the things that would already happen

Now what is that called again?
It means to prepare the way
I just have never actually fully seen this side of him
Isn't though that would took him?

In 1997 when another left
I arose and wrote:
"Now I see, why he had to die;
so that I could have a better life."

Don't you know that had I not seen that side fully;
all would have been vanity
For to complete the race is the where the prize is
And you see as I finish my verse why this is not pride.

But first let me tell you about a man
Who came to me and said:
These are for you:
A book "Gunfighters" and another "Famous battles of the Civil War."
Then he got down on one knee and said, "No matter what you want to do when you grow up- I love you."

You it also is almost a boast, that the way I answered then
was not like a toast
Baseball daddy
But then he slowed; almost causing me to think about it

And so:
Her name to me is substance; which means I have and is faith
the very essence of life
I would cry to her but my love already has my desire prepared

I would run to her, but yet I am with her now
And I am being stored up- and it is for her!

She sees my inner parts and we are unashamed
I can not stand to be in outer darkness away
I let you go.
I have received to not protect you
from myself anymore.

I love you,
mine
my own.

And now:
it's what I long for
it's what I need
it's what He gives to me

When I remember and you still love me
when I commune and you breath

I have always been told
if you let this go
what can you receive?

Memories, sweet memories
I want to write a free verse
doesn't that make it not, then, now?

The cross is a thorn when I try to funk the system
But I guess that's the cross too
But then that does make it a thorn

The first time it was the effect
now it's my state

I just found out that I did it for the date
But even the date's a state

I know the answer

But how can I prepare when it's all for a different age?

Hope for this age hurts when I realize or see
that right now I have nothing

'it was meant to be' doesn't get to me
when I remember
how it was put to me plainly.

'Covering'�
One more special message to go, and then I'm done and I can go home.

"In His hands"
Wouldn't want to fake it
if I had to try
Feeling so sedated
even if I'm high
taken medications
till my stomach's full
Wouldn't want to fake it
livin in this world

But I see the sun beat
it's in His hands
....Grass is greener over here
now I've found you..fraid' of fear


I have to pick up my medicine and do my laundry and take a shower.


I trust you with my life: and in this completion it now means unspeakable and indiscribable.

How it is that because of love
whether we wait or whether we go (And I have to be honest, I'm kind of nervous still about the go, and I might be asking for a little time and equity (not too long)-
but I can't tell if it doesn' matter or if it does
and I can't exress either or whether
And these are the words which are unlawful to speak
Like wanting to know about your wedding dress or how your hair might look

And still it is also unspeakable whether or either we made it or....

And now I agree, that right now I don't have to know

And these are my words to my love
whom for me
has given a light that encompasses...

And I can't say that last part is unspeakable too, or that if I wanted to try and stop right now and say that this moment, now wait, this life, this hope...

I got it: I love you

'My words recited in honest verse because of you'�
I feel really rejected and vulnerable and taken advantage of and I forget the other word.

I am falling and I need help.

I can't do this by myself.

I wait for you and it seems
like I am being played

I don't have anymore energy to do this.

And I feel and think that you are doing this
so I, and to see,

regarding what I do when you don't come to me.

Maggie I miss you.

I really want to say
that I forgive you
and I mean it
but I don't know how to tell you
I've said and done and been so many things that's not me
and I don't even want to ask you
to forgive me
I want to change

The things you said, were the most beautiful things
I have ever read

and I fell like I just need to shut up
Sometimes I feel like I want to be with you
but sometimes I feel like I don't even want to touch you
Because you are the most beautiful flower I have ever seen

And also sometimes your love when it's rejected
it's because of me

Sometimes I just want to always commune
But also I get tired and I feel stuck in the middle
of always everlasting and always not asking

I can't wait for heaven.

Though my tears and my cries
They tell me that I would rather say
That I want to wait for heaven
and I can't wait any longer for you now

And my heart and us say
that what I want to say
is that I can wait

And I don't any longer have to say
'but that still doesn't mean that you should stay away.'

'Complete the state now- making the date then'�
Dinner with my uncle Jay? - someday.

'OOC'�
Out of control- my plastic idol

For really it all is in the framework

And I died, but later revived

My first impression was that death had birthed me

But when as David was loyal- when the voice spoke

I remembered not to toy

Out of control- my falling idol

From here to there- never hear surf music again

One day I did digress, as I told you and tried to act nice

Remember? When I put off game

Out of control- not an idol

But Nirvana pulled the wool over my non-existant smile

I tried to reap in a world where nothing came to

Thank God one day He came to me; and I came too

Out of control- now only to them

As I danced and sang thinking-'you' lie cheat and steal

Your own auditorium of eyes I took; because of love

Out of control- a blissful fate

Which really should say destiny

When time no longer waits

Is it still hope then? If waiting has been lifted?

I don't know but I couldn't see it anyways when it was called the first.

All I know is that now my blanket is remembering and knowing and enjoying and meditating and communing and resting and falling and finding that you love me.

Falling away- from out of control->into control
And out of this hole where once a mole could not stand to think he could have a soul.

I still wonder, about those days

When are where it is
that choice came
And I still wonder and wait
at those times

If really fate has power
or love was too late

Because my princess would never have needed to be saved
if love had never paused

And I still haven't found out
about those days

When those who really have heart
fell away

I just wonder
Because of what I was made to taste

Now I have found
that the pause was a gap until He came

And now in that gap it is that a cross has paid
And that the pause really wasn't made
but was falling away

And life came as strecthing saved

But still I can't forget what I was made to taste
And I would never wish it on anyone, except those who love it's fate

When the soul is a black hole
Hope refrains
And the conscience undoubtedly remembers those days

But now it has come that the price which was paid
was both buried and hidden away
on purpose
but a lie came
saying that 'if I say I didn't know' then I presume it won't be too late

And I have said, and still contain the words which came
Spoil no doubt
And a good measure pressed down

But that fear which said it was reality-
That the only thing that I could say-
was that I don't want to pay
(Which really isn't enough to say)
so either come down
or go up again

So that for my sake
love's sake would be defamed

It's funny
things matter only in Marah

But if I complain at Meribah
then I won't actually have attained

So now I know that one is not enough
in many ways

Three is that nirvana
but what I really want

Is first to know everything about her and never refrain

And only am I alive when three are one
so that everday and all day
is definitely infinite
and infinitely definite

I love you

'Honestly'�
Honestly
I could go on for hours

Making ways and truths and lifes
Out of one hour

An hour glass
really
I think it's a figure

Too bad too bad too bad
But 'really' how's the weather?

Words sometimes do not matter
Whether I say hit me
or your lucious lips I dreamt about
for an hour

That was a night
with hope-

day would come and our eyes would be bright
for each other

My best gift I am worst at
as I tell you that either it's a hex or a conundra
that Journey
really hurt me

It's the way I run
I can't get hurt

And truthfully in running like that
I am made known to know that I am dirt

I already forget what happened
But the spoil was what I was after

Because honestly in all honesty honesty really means
that those dreams which are on top of ruins
are the only things

Which contain anything
that I could even speak of

I don't know why or how
but ever since I was a child
I have never gotten into trouble
or paid for my own guile

But these were given to me
and then told of me and to me and to you and to us and to they and to us and to they
That I did it
that they are from me
that they are of me
that they are in me
that they are because of me
that they are with me
and that they are me

Now that I have had time to think about it
I think
if I had done the dishes and cleared everything out of the sink
Just like 'mommy' said
That I wouldn't have a worthy answer which can't be spoken

Saying that the thing which I am is
a flesh which was made one
and spirit which always was

And now I wonder about my own honest verse
because if I had known that back then?
Surely I would have been called as having a curse

For some reason spontinatey is called divine
That was my pause

Truth however is that no one saw

Because my own woman
is not something to be lost
Because if she was something to be lost
then she would be something to purchase

Thank God oh man that this plan is without versus

'Once'�
All at once it came
All at once shame
All at once as if a game
All at once now I walk in fame

All at once I am free
All at once none can stand against me
All at once what the difference between
All at once burning in a sea

Once I cried
Once I apologized
Once I died

Twice I lived
Twice We spoke

Three times again and I live

Unity was found in Him as now I am four
Unity they drowned in without any more

Relationship was the truth as only death died

Power was used as not only I survived

Multiplicate my number and my past lives
And do it again and my future begins

Single I have been and yet my own refused
Double I spoke in so that only my own would choose
Thrice again doubtless again that life lives on without an end

The fifth is when revelation actually births
From what was always into what encompasses the beginning which means for me that I have no end
but have been hedged in so that serve means myrrh

Six I see doesn't actually mean, if you knew an Arab and what was written early

It actually means that I shall never be
alone as if I couldn't be a trinity

No one has sought and no one has thought
And so only my own shall grow into a home

Choice was their tail
and now a tale like a snail reaps hail for mail

Seven over rewards me as I am
and eight moreover gives me who I am

Nine is all that I have right now
which is full in context but not to what shall be revealed

Ten my body shall be fulfilled
And against Us and Me and I shall nothing prevail

And now it is that I have no lack, and I don't mean just in feelings like there is something true to that.

But I feel in me
this gravity
which is sweet

Some are cowards and are spoiled children
Who need an undertow and a name given

Unto things which really never begin

Their only hope is what they have now
Which is all vanity provided by a shroud

Because they demand that another should prove
and condemn when they themselves have not considered they themselves having any truth

They think that nothingness will be enough
to say that something is nothing just because of lust

Therefore my gravity is happy
and it comforts me

As my own bones are known and my flesh drinks

Life in my blood and my life which is my soul
Is fulfilled and shows that more than only my first platform is new

And here is where I will cast off discouragement
which that woman desires to burden with-

My bone and my flesh are two in one; and one in them then is my blood

And so so that waiting isn't from being empty

I will take notice that inside of my blood is my body

Because as I breath I gather in and as I breath I go out.

And this is only part of what I have found.

'With and without each other'�
If I only had a concept
it could lead to being dislexic

If I only had direction
it could lead to autism

If I am a body, I have three
Two voices would encompass me

If I was neither a woman or a man
I would have to be something didn't start with a plan

If my eye has seen and my ear has heard and it has entered into my heart such a precious word

I would come to know and bathe in snow like wool
Because carpe diem doesn't satisfy the soul

Unable to be renewed am not I
But living for love I can still do on this earth

So a boast of mine is that from death to life
means really that I can't have sex until
the wedding which has no night

In chains held are those who fell
and mingled their flesh as others dwelt

Because an Angel is a Man and
humans can know messengers outside of His plan

A ladder said
that in the future life begins
even unto those who are a servant
despite some who came to accuse regarding a man who was not sent

Many ways am I right
About how a fall shows eternal ones an Immortal Knight
When has anything ever died
Which was truly alive

Which shall not have everlasting life

My heart is flesh but you can not see it
Which means not that it is spiritual
but not like without a body that can not procreate

But that it is born and only was forever in He who is a Mate

More answers are with my spoil today
But I want to be sure that I don't run away

'Meanings'�
If I was a pendulum I would swing
Going back and forth between
being an individual
and a body

And I would call that movement ascending and descending
To and fro but including contentment

Because the only point at which I could be
is at the point from which it hangs

Knowledges have I which are very deep
from single to many and everything inbetween

What I meant to say was that I AM spiritual
And also that I am only created when I am an individual

Knowledge increases
as now I know
who the two are
which die with a blow

Also I have seen
many things
marvelous things

Like how dianoia doesn't exactly mean understanding

Even actually achieving a story taken from the letter and the shape

And knowing what four creatures means

Also I have come to know what it means in perilous shows
Even unto a meaning
showing where things are and where things are leading

Still in keeping with what is not misleading

'What is it?'�
I keep myself to yes and no
and so I don't do anything which isn't really known

But then again
because with isn't it isn't yes and no

With me it is yes, and also that is a promise I know

Being revealed doesn't exactly mean
what some have made it out to be

And also it must be seen
how not finishing a sentence can cause a gap inbetween

So that One may gain His bride
as it is

Because lies came in which reversed
and made life a system

And also I would like to say
that bad things are free things which some manipulate
making them a fake

If you wanted to know I would say that the answer isn't simple

Because I am not meat for some dinner

Pure and single and genuine am I

Perilous really means that it both won't and found a way to hide

But everything that happens is because of light
still though one should choose the right side

The answer could be derived
and right

Also I like to be immersed in wholeness, and also specifically, reaching heights

Broad is the way which is not love
but also it also means it is taken care of from above

One more thing I would to say
is that I think if people cast off restraints

That they would see
grace is not some law which makes darkness okay

but the free gift of His power by which I receive things

Up from the earth I know what that means- because hell is underneath and some exist there for reasons

Like making sure that they didn't descend
by showing people how to be like them

A healed wound is just this-
coming up from the abyss

Ahab repented but his wife did not
and so that being will deceive

In reading not generally
it is found that a little horn came from grecia

Ten kings is not in the west
but Seleucid's portion of the goat's head

To rise actually means to get up in order to leave

And if you want the answer it doesn't matter if I leave

Ginosko and oida are different
Revelation was given after He entered His rest

The sixth over the land laid down salt.
And out of the feet come ten toes to assalt.

Being one over the earth
doesn't mean exactly waht many have heard

A number should actually read a multitude
and a mark is worn as a seal like many do

It is all about the heart and works are rags
And to pass up on being perfect inside
could either mean going to die
or having no where to hide.

One spoke of a woman again encompassing a man
And if my insides can't be perfect then someone would
just really have said marriage is in heaven

Three uprooted for a little horn
and woe to the nation who calls other's messengers to itself and is not reborn

'Happy/blessed?'�
If I am on my way to entering in,
then I can keep what I refine and cleanse

'Mantle'�
One time I thought
if I laid it down in front of me
Then my flowing substance poured out on top
Would protect me and keep me from every shock

And not that I am saying that
I think you are in need of a break
But what I really want to say is that
if you hold on I will show you
how I am not and was never late

Things we said today
please don't call love luck
and though I sit and sat in quiet contemplation please
remember me

I don't know how
but somehow I was given a bow
Which wasn't without an arrow for my own show
But which contained colors from Patmos to this now hope

Though in between
in the letters
the colors were in the sky
and never touched the ground like you and I
Overcoming means that at death
the seed dies

So for those moments for us
where we have yet to enter in
please consider that
the whole word is not in

It's just
that for a morcel some refrain
I have been there
and been made

What happens is that such great a hope
seems so lost
when by sight the path
no longer has any light

No matter where you look
you can't see where you are from
or where you are going

All that you know is that if you don't leave
you're going to explode

And really I know
and again I didn't have anything to put down

What did I do?

Why else would I have worked longer than you
except that there were more things for me to go through
more things- that is the reason I came to the vineyard
unseen

I hate it when it seems as if the only way to go is be deceived infinitely.

And I hate it when it seems as if the only thing that is hindering is actually little old me

Lesser things, they pay
but also what if I am not made?

That would be more the reason to fall away

If I didn't have this hope in me I would agakrezo for you right now

And with this hope now right now the promise is allowed.

How happy am I?

It is unspeakable

How sad am I?

Only when I fake it

But even then do you see? That for those who enter in,
A giants sword in the good place
means that those things which are only corrupted
but not from a different spirit
those things which seem too right to be true
where I attested
Those things I am given, but in truth

And so I am not faking anything
Like how coca begins to work because of trying to be cool

But really I am confessing promises and also carrying my cross no matter how cruel

It really is great
when all things bad are non existent things

When sight doesn't prevail
and I may have precious things

I think about you in the perfect imperative
And never have I known anyone so sweet

Still,
sometimes I feel

just like with us
that if only we didn't believe things just because we believe them
we would be in each other's trust

Come mantle come,

that doorway into the sky

when the dead rise for firstfruits

and then forty days go by

and still when the last trumpet calls and we go up by breath

I knew when I wrote that that was spiritual

but isn't it right now we can meet each other today

You know the end of Hebrews 11 means perfect in every way

I have said before my reason as to how this is right

That we could meet and live

still in truth

and in this night
wait
more than those who watch for the morning
for that eternal light

Because hope is in the future
and other's had the gift
the hope of perfection is what is for heaven
and of which the remnant now exists

So what I mean to say is baby come to me today
Because it's for love and not just as if to redeem

And I think with everything else that I have said it to date

'Come'�
It has become my hinderance,
I don't want to let go of this
it is the only thing that saved my life

"Come... and I will teach you"

The tail, oh how it wanted to sift me
But there was prayer for me
It has a piece of me
When the head started to depart from where I was
There I was
I knew if I chased it I would lose
Because with what it had, and my situation
I would have to follow it without knowing
I was of a different persuasion
I mean definitively
without compromising
And then I knew if I tried to leave it would strike me
and with what it had I wouldn't prevail
And yet I knew that if I had stayed
by the time the tail left
I would be left like Ursela's pets

So as baby steps
I crouched low
as a lion
waiting to tear it's prey
and because of Him
I as a lion
did not fear any

But know what do I do?
As now I want more to be given

have I not been profitable?
Have I not declared and not hidden?

If only He would come to me
And revive once again

Really it would be that way
where nothing could go out or come in

Nothing that was unclean
and no one who wasn't saved

Then it would be true- my dreams
(Of which sometimes I digress so that I don't ask for too much and get told no because I am not ready)
Where I could hold you and know you and feel you and touch you
Our heart's stolen away

My understanding, our understanding
that we would not lean on it
Because not being ready, yes means more baby steps

But really if there is no destination
what do we have left?

Even to build for there
Because He adds to us with care

By sight all things are impossible
And that is why promise prevails

Because we can't judge life
by the colors of the scales
Even though our eyes resemble
the skin
but with right symbolic prisms

I would rather be embarassed and nervous then without you
If only you would forgive me for any lack of forwardness

But you don't understand...
with me...
that is genuineness

Because I don't want to be whitewashed

Which is what happens

Because first people say they can have it
and then they try to make divinity destiny and what was meant to be

But then when I go forward, even tripping
going forward with my feet dirty
with divinity and things that are to be
I am told that white is black
and that black closely is still a little grey

Who doesn't want to change?

I mean before that Day

That's the mindset that falls away

And yet I am told I am that because of my dirty feet

When really those who don't themselves enter in, kept me from being able to meet.

You were right for coming to me
but you were not wrong for coming to me

You were wrong for not coming to me completely

And here is the thing: that that is why and how and what it means to fall away

Because look:
That is only right as beauty for ashes, as intentions that have not yet been
and that is only right as attesting
and works perfecting faith what they meant, I want to say is that those who do not enter in
it is they who fall away
and do not love
because of the condition
and that is not the promise
and that has no reward

Abraham left his place, and then not even completely until he left his family

24 years is a promise and He gives warnings

So judging rightly is with love and truth
rightly dividing
alligning according to love and promise
and not only knowing that darkness is as a non existent thing
but also now moving forward because of three things

and there are numerous things of what I speak

My heart and spirit and soul; my blood and flesh and bone; my depths and wedding supper and wine

they have myrrh in your name

Your voice to me is sweet
and how I wish we were pillars in the physical
who never left

Oh my love
to me you are more brilliant then infinite stars
and more precious than the sun above

and without you my lesser light
even now my symbolism falls

My love oh love
please do not forget

And also please please digest
into your spirit
these words
and let them be honey to your mouth and oil for your head

and forgive even my deepest flaws

I can not remain, and soon I must go home
I am hungry and thirsty
and my necessary things are left back at home

If I go any slower than this
my mind is going to fail

Because once we have been profitable with little
I would like to say that that is not complete until the will

That on the left there may be service which is encompassed in myrrh; and on the right there may be exaltation which reminds and finds that we forever sail

For our spirits see, and also we have two eyes

If only enlightenment was not a bad word
and the words which say 'it is better to have love and lost than to never have loved at all' would be beaten as dust and blown away

That the fire would be for those who stay away

And that being bottomless would be for those who are never made

Then I would stand
confidence would be mine from Him, and mine from Him

I would not be ashamed, and or fall away

I couldn't forget my face

I would not be afraid

But I would kiss your face

'One thing'�
I have forgotten one thing of which I am made high

One thing is there of which day comes from night

One thing is there of which failing is never a plight

One thing there is of without which I would die

One thing there is that I left out to say

that the only reason you have not come, is because of the circumstance because of the condition of which I told you before meant and was mercy and grace given

But now I must say and tell you that to still not come away
is to fall away

Sorrowing as having no hope; and being pitiable in this world as if we are fasely humble
if we think that life is in deprivation

then that sorrow leads to death

And void the word of God of which the price has been paid

But unto those who don't come there is only falling away

Men's traditions don't win, and the vanity is concerning them

So I was justifying you by saying that not coming to me all the way
was like because of possibilities of which I even was in debt and am today

However still though
not completing brings calamity of which there will be mockery

Because if our excuse is that because of condition and circumstance and tradition that we can not meet

then it is true that because of condition and circumstance and tradition that we can not meet.

Because there is a line and only one thing makes it: love

and because we are either for or against because to not be completely for is to be against

Therefore impossibilities is for those who are on the wrong side

And also all things are possible with God

So let's not try to hide

this talent
and also

either try to think
or not care and so lose our prize

that we can really expect to live
if we do not first die to what is only by sight

For that is walking by flesh
And also it leads to death

And for us who know the truth it would be better had we not
then to have known it
and to turn away

and therefore have the worm which never dies

'Fishing? Catching?'�
My love,

Assertiveness, passive agressiveness, agressiveness

are all rubbish and rags

Because I don't have to do anything

But that is love being grand

Because what is grey is not new and right and white

But really a deception on top of another

Because it is one thing to be wrong

and another to try to make wrong right

And so those thoughts and dreams are empty visions and words
Which come through many words and philosophy and every other evil thing

Envying and having selfish ambition so that I don't have to admit to anything

Except to admitting to what will gratify me not admitting to anything

Because if something is grey it has black

And sin is lawlessness which leads to more lawlessness

and doesn't enter in

'Ascertaining assertive assertations'�
Assertiveness tells me that I only care about myself, and i don't care about what anyone else does;

and so what happens is that someone is wrong unless I think they are right

Which could even mean saying they are right

themselves

for some or any reason

so that I can still think I am right

And so relationship is business, strictly business

And love has no right

'Others'�
And now passive agressiveness and agressiveness are things I use and use to ploy with which are evidences of how my assertiveness is not all about me.

And as soon as I do this I gain power because darkness loses power manifesting, in the light

So when I have these things, what happens is that I am manipulating and controlling and using other people as they involve other people

But not being white

And so I not only am lazy, not coming to the light myself;
but also keep other back which is wickedness.

Sin is missing the mark;

and evil is doing it on purpose

and wickedness is causing others to miss the mark

Because either I am for Him or against Him

Because either we have the incorruptible white or we don't
and to he or she who has, more will be given; and to he or she who doesn't have; even what they have will be taken away from them: what they neglected.

'Templatively'�
Time has gone past in the essence of not redeeming the life which lasts.

Perhaps not remembered, but really in the heart- truth it seems has come unto me; and here is our concern- it doesn't depart.

Now, in love; it is for those who think: that for love to end in being together; then it also must begin together, and so;

And also there are many reasons under the sky; of which I have not lied.

But of a little of the number of my earnings, my wages; and beyond fair; I wish to give a part of what I have heard; and may it be understood upon some ear:

(Stage: a man who is a sailor saved a rich person's life; and is at their home for dinner. And there is chemistry between the sailor and the person who was saved sister.)

"Later at the piano she played for him, and at him, aggressively, with the vague intent of emphasizing the impassableness of the gulf that separated them. Her music was a club that she swung brutally upon his head; and though it stunned him and crushed him down, it incited him.

He caught her spirit of antagonism and strove to divine the message that her hands pronounced upon the keys.

Sensation invested itself in form and color and radiance, and what his imagination dared, it objectified in some sublimated [way]. Past, present, and future mingled; and he went on oscillating across the broad, warm world, through high adventure and noble deeds to Her- with her, winning her, his arm about her, and carrying her on in flight through the empery of his mind."

"Martin Eden"
Jack London

'Diseases all around'�
Words seem so far away, when memories battle insecurity and expanses are willing and able if I could only speak and do in the state of being illumed and continued.

Left alone, seen the end and I groan
I myself am worthless alone
Praise is ability and strength when used
Joy is mine as now I climb

Words are mine
but I am like a deer
to failure

An insect to some

Victory, Brandon
there is no end
to live or to die

Poison
it's lukewarm
B's are a swarm
love is worn
so pain transforms
and BY MYRRH I am born
There is no end or beginning
it's a lie to say
simplicity breeds anything

A trinity of stones alive for me:
The pearl which says I am with you when we you are suffering
a diamond which says we have made it, that darkness was just us not revealed
and amber, that self consuming fire
which is us okay no matter what

The problem with the stony is that they never breath out the pearls, and their diamonds never really have to do with loving a girl, then amber is divided into hypocritical states

And you might want to notice that there was no we in the above described pearl and it's fate.

'Love's lines'�
Ambigous results guide the colors not found in eyes
Purple my royalty is absent as red is not in eyes
except by photographs
which do not do patrons justice

Orange my fire can only be imagined from the starting
points which encumber the color of eyes

Amber blue green and brown
These soft tones show that children are all who are at the start

Which is on the increasing hope as it would not be found a crime to say

Yellow, being chosen, is found but only by those who only imagine it.
Therefore freedom tos ome enlightened shows that I get what I want and so responsible

But again it could not be found a crime to stay in this child like bath.

Brown is in eyes and so is a mystery. As it comes from red and green.
Do brown eyes therefore give placement, as red not to some means working through detriment?

But now and lo is me for these were given the intuitive master plan.

But I would rather live by me and dream
for sunglasses are my catalyst and or a forgotten word

To view stars and trees and looked over things

For nothing in creation let alone blood is red purely, not just brown and it's cream
Showing me and few that actually we are here to notice this fact.

Being able to pause all but as noticing
everything aside from this rue
Giving full respect to the color and only color which is only found covered by skin and tubes
Therefore all detriments are taken catre of by those who may walk when paused

Noticing all things which do not rely upon shedding blood
So I don't have to paint or look on the color red

No,
it's not even on my eyelid's canvas of which I view
though they are sometimes open

Because life is not in the things I say or do or shed
(that's how it really is: shedding)
But in how I can imagine- all things red means I haven't, just not yet
gone the distance
because 5 other colors in the rainbow
must be viewed, and at no expense

so that life is present in it's words: "I love you."


And just for the many and myself who wish to think, that red is found in many and darling things:

Not a sparrow shall fall from the ground,, so if red is with you, it means that you never have had to make one sound.

Which really and honestly comes to mean: that if I have viewed it restfully, this is what it means: At the end of the day, after being free or not, or having love in the heart, or whether to let it rot; it matter's whose side I am on.

'24 hour mud'�
Where's the bottle containing cries?
I am broken and dead inside
and there is nowhere to hide
left alone and without life
left to die and live by pride
controlled by contraceptive ties
uncontrolled as a surfer's tide
mellow and low is where I hide
From the traps and from the lies
Uncold and unhot I sigh
unallowed even to buy
unconcerned with matters of life
and death occurs
though I know there's a time
To patrol the lines of mine
I'm patronized and relaxed as a dime
collected as a mold to a penny's mind
from somewhere in 1979.

The lower parts are undefined
nondescript if I only could find

Too in the morning and too at night
but first take care of mind.

Paper's a find and life's behind
poets are dead and stars confined by time
Painters instead block my bed, my request, as I want a friend
Sleep's for fools and laziness a tool
transcripts are cool
and divinity is not who

Contempt I don't know who
I eat cow
but 65 says I'll be torn by two

My body seizes
and I can't tell
move

I'm a puppet and a master
the end of me
triumph over disaster
the Spirit "Yes......(~?~)"
but without me I'll be cast as her
Life 'Yes!'
but without me I'll have tempored plaster.
"You tell Them"
Emotionally uncreative
fellow markers uniquelly sedated
Uniquelly still unsedatively fellow

A part of me unique and partly in unity
Desiring smoking
ahhh so mellow
My own temperate template
never believing to say hello

Drowning pins constantly stand
as magnetic points cause sand to be glass

Un-understood fires don't believe
the difference between an arm and a sleeve
So what was meant to be isn't seen
only in the light of losing

Who or how can I explain
to a sky moonlit
that whether or not the sun shines that life doesn't quit

If only Zechariah was alive,
he could explain what it means to be made to die alive

But Jehovah remembers so it doesn't matter
to the truly fallen what it means to be left alive to die

"You or me"
If I could I would
no let me say
You know I would if I could
but you
you know that isn't good enough

It's sealed and this deal is a thrill

It's my heart or my flesh
and but
I can't feel

Your own breath I won's steal

The pleasure is mine, and the pain is too.

Hunger and thirst because love has lost it's nest
The power of death has come
from your consent

No fear in love
but it's over at your request

Who has eyes which can see beyond less?

Death has come, my Owne's request

So I starved and bathed by my own chest

Words cannot contain as you have left and could not resist

Now the door is closed and you have no more death

But a worm to reply at your darkness

'Love in the air'�
There is this recess in the back of my mind.

Do you know how many times?

Wondering are you really in this. And I mean much more than a couple who still have witness.

Do you know how I felt that night I tried to go to bed thinking of you?

How it was on my mind. What I learned that day, and you choose since you will anyways. How that day I put it together, about my dad, and about his death.

My uncle once told me I could ask anything I wanted to about it. But I had nothing on my mind except being with him. So he told me that he had been to the hospital with my dad a few times. And he was losing his mind.

That night as I was in my bed, my spirit being crying and hearing the end. I cried and pleaded, I asked, "Don't let me die!" And then when I had given all that I had, it was still in the air.

And do you know what wasn't? Your love. Where are your works?

So I got myself up and took my bottle. 82 trileptal at 300 each. I was crying as I noticed I had taken them. But all the time I knew the truth, and really I didn't waver either way. I didn't think to God I would live. As if I was committing my spirit to Him, that I did.

And I had arranged my place without anything. So that there would be none in which to blame. Your jacket I took and left next to my mom's. And I decided I would lie in bed with my Bible on my chest. I remember, and I did then, so I changed my motive, but still was going to do it anyways.

How one pyschiatrist had played me as incurable, as most do and did. How I had lain with my Bible cluthced over my chest with both hands.

And then I wanted to smoke. And so I left. To find a cigarette. Horton Plaza is easy for this.

From 13th street I got to fifth, going to fourth. Before I could not see anymore. And so I sat down as I often had. Knees up and head in my lap. My arms crossed that's usually how I slept on the street. Easy to keep warm, and easier with a jacket as a blanket.

And as I was still praying my head began to swim.

I remember when....when I was hurting and reaching out, at a crisis house. How I needed more but they couldn't give, because of mania, that's they're doctrine. So once I was out I took more than they said I could. It said, be careful of the sun.

Well I thought that meant for reasons of burning your skin. So when I had been taking one more each time, and walking from Mission to Pacific along the boardwalk that time- I swear I almost had a stroke and would have died- if not for my volition which is about heart EVERYTIME.

So I really thought 82 would kill me right away. At least almost but not this day.

I began to puke on my side. Someone called the 911 and they arrived. I remember trying to get up even before, and my body seived and thrived. My head felt fine, funny now to think....

How is this for mania when the cops and paramedics thought they messed up, here I was a suidical kid giving two thumbs up.

Well they gave me a shot and then that's all I remembered, until I woke up in the hospital two days later.

Antivan it was, and that's all they had to do. I had puked up so much, at least that's close enough to what they said later....(no ryyme found at the moment)

I was told also that I had been flaling about, not wanting people to hurt me, though you could imagine the condition yourself

I awoke fine and still suicidal to the nurse. Telling her if I had the chance I'd do it again.

Well here is something I have learned: all that social anxiety and suicide legally bound by birds

Went out as I was unconsious, even according to my verse.

I knew when I come to, it was all over

There was no more me and you

The condition you see must be treated, I mean isn't that what your family was preachin'

But you all with unfeigned tongue, hold onto your consequences and never believed in anything more fun

So here I am fine as can be, and honestly, better than I have ever been you see

For I died to all that which I was held by,

one time for all and now I wake up to heaven

For those whom have not heard this before-
to kill the temple well there is more to that then the wish to explore

Zechariah means Jehovah remembers: he was caught between the altar and the temple

The temple, well that's the outer court, and he was caught on the porch

Where Jachin and Boaz are- so is the will: in His counsel and by His strength

Jesus Himself was told to come down, to heal Himself; which really sounds familiar to what you and your parents held in renown.

They cross, the suffering, the death, was all placed on them-
and yet they chose to stay- which makes foolish anyone who wants revolutionary victory

at least not of first importance
making it of the heart

And of last importance
physically being there from the start

And so to destroy the temple, that means to leave
to save one's life
though there are some who have ties in which their flesh is all tied up in strife

as I

But it was avoidable, don't you see?

How by your impudence all of this was placed on me

And that I did by choice and is not the greatest of my concern

But you chose your delicate form of life because of your lack of following wisdom

Which knew without a doubt that all of this could have happened

ending in anothyer fleshly route

The spirit is first (By faith we should understand)

And here even this will finish your demands-

It was finished even before He died. Then He committed Himself and gave even Himself over to death's tide.

So He took everything which was laid on Him- by choice though He didn't have to and love was made a kin.

We are to walk just as He walked

What was lacking in His afflictions they were present and am today

Which means that I was up there with Him, and have borne the burdens of many.

So love was in the air that day and every other

Not that I am pushing suicide, but let not another dare

To judge as if they judge rightly
those whose hearts burn and burn out brightly.

Somewhere I have seen this before
I have seen Kurt crying and wondering if Unplugged was even more than a bore.

I have heard Brad talk of his soul being off of the ground.

Well I asked him one day since then
if I might burn out brightly
and did this without works as a net of which all of what I think I have is stored

And then I received and it was given to me- that I should but on that die. As my seed dies and I fly away.

So now I choose as I have said before
not to be like those who come from a system to be original but away by far. I believe that I love love and even have spoil as said before;

And originality comes from love, and love all around

So that I might be real with the real feelings I have-

I both (and not to limit myself, but this is at hand) may go from pain to a new complaint; and also as if in a van- unable to keep my soul on the sand, though I might have to pull over for the unsoundness, not just of some other band.

I have to say, every day now is my best day. In everything. And there also is much more to say, more than words.

And also I have to say that no matter where or how I look- none of them contain you (and to ryhme and maybe explain later because He does everything- and or yours).

Love,

Victory

'Title'�
Well,

my friends and family you see
did nothing but want us to be

They never lied nor stretched the truth
But did all they could and knew

So as to not let me be lost in loving you

You know and will know each day

The LORD and His way
in which we were to be

I asked you even, and you agreed

But something kept you from physically coming to me

And as I went through my mentor unto you
it was all that you allowed
from that day in which you sent your friends to come to me- and I ketp myself to the truth

And so your family moved
as if to call this whole thing
non truth
even to say it never happened

My family and friends are not the same as you
They told me straight and never strayed from a me and you

I may not have received a sign
but signs follow His loved, and not His loved after any sign

I had called my mentor and through communication I grew
communication in which you refused to come to me
and your parents as if the whole thing was not truth

Do you know what it is called when a person's wants to control another?

Whether for good or bad I mean in truth not the usual clutter
words of emptiness spoken by empthy hearts

And also as I have heard: even the wicked receive what they earn: money and whatever for which they work

And your family wished that I have more money than I have
More things in which you may be seen and think glad

But unto me, as Jacob with Leah's dad
God gave unto me, it seems more than any one has had

I look unto that Day
really my favorite book must be read correctly

The second coming and the rapture in truth
just as Christ His body rose on first fruits

The dead in Christ are again to rise, not those of the law who rest since being in paradise

40 days later then everyone changed
when He comes in the clouds,
not setting foot
on the mountain

This is the sign of Jonah
which for signs a wicked generation asks
For those of which are His are changed
and whose body's will always rest.

The day the hour? Well tell me what you do or do not know.

I know my Savior and His exactness
Of which right now I don't know where to begin to tell of
all of those
those searched out matters which are the glory of the king

Free love? Well tell me what you mean-
I promise anyone that there are none who will come away victors
in going any rounds with Me.

Trust Me, what do you think it means?

When the Greek talks of a rapture
and one is taken out of the way, which is He?

Jehovah Shalom and rest Shabath

Well I guess I could say, that His thoughts are too numerous to be recounted back to Him

And also it is not so
anything that says that
it's simple!
It is not found in Him.

Shabath

'Imputed blame'�
I could be called a fanatic, a frenzy, infatuated

But I remember
that day in seventh grade

When I asked for you,
Through God
when yet the days remained

I remember submitting myself and holding myself accountable
Though things happened on this earth

For which I turn to Paul when he was picking and he gathered

When that snake bit him but he shook it off

And besides have you not read of the many of which had nothing while in this world

I mean the centurion at least had all even more than any in spirit in Israel

I have to tell you again
The Psalms really most are written by David
but also against those in the Holy Land

And take it or leave it
I mean all who may read

Whether or not now because of having now law, we do anything,

"But we do do things when we are to work"

Really Paul called the Galtians fools, and I want to call all who say grace jerks

What it is is the free gift
of the power of God
by which we receive Him

Andn ot the free gift of which we can do anything and we get what we don't deserve

Isn't that what most believe?

Well anyways...

I remember how I even said, before fifth grade that Jesus I accepted

my conscience knew of my emptiness
and that race was shown to me so real

None are lost, that's not what I mean
(Except those who do down to perdition)

Anyways my talent reaped 30 then 60 then 90 until that day
when I got 100

after you fell away.

And so being spiritual, to some it seems almost unfair
how I can judge rightly and yet not be judged finding error

But being spiritual is not what is mostly taught
but how to market Jesus
and then really tell peole

break it down so simply

so that leaving the world is not really what it is truthfully

I have studied meditation I know

It is not found in emptying nor filling like a room

There is a pendulum from which knowledge hangs
from individual unto a body
inbetween ascending and descending
five knowledges in Him
The other two: all things and rest always in Him

And so to meditate there is only one point
where contentment is and that is at the point
where the pendulum hangs-
that is God and love

I know whom I have believed, and His root is not in that I am dumb (Put so blatently).

Knowledge increased and many go to and fro

He comes as a thief in the night, unto those whom He does not know

A ladder of angels? Well here is the truth
No one brings up the word or brings it down

The truth is found in to and fro

How to know

Sex is lovely as He

And in another way: it goes from a look, to a date, unto everything.

But the mark of those whom have come into the world, of whom He never knew- are those in which in the flesh (even against their own rules) never come to live and bath in love as a sun.

'Believ-ING'�
All at once: freedom, life, and freedom

All at once: even in the present situation

Believing when it began
2006, you said yes,

You heard His words, and mine as well

But then ultimatums still swelled

And so then next you heard His words and mine as well

The first had to do with freedom
And now they told you something else
Even more

The joy and the future and the life and the love
Eternal

And so you still chose

Ultimatums and endings

Lying even to yourselves

Why was it then
that you believed in only the gifts on which We sail?

You never actually
Believed in anything

Of which had to do with me being freed
and being alive and well

And so now it has come
and the time is now
Where those things mattered and your beliefs in all is well

Have been locked out
and so outside a hunger rises
of Which can never be in delt for health

Never believing in life itself
and attesting only because of self and sails

So now darkness consumes
and inside light bends and stretches and is destroyed

Never actually achieving
There is no balance between never loving and also only wanting sails

So that your own self judged self
Could remain for reasons taking up every shelf

A lesson, power known
just as it was before dealt

Five His number you only loved yourself
Blaspheming is not what some think
When you then passed up on Love which was heartfelt

And so five more it was done for you
Because you wouldn't even deal with yourself

Ten have come and now it is done
Except missing is yourself

'My way (the highway?)'�
"You never give me your money
you only give me you funny paper
And in the middle of negotiation you break down

I never give you my number
I only give you my situation
And in the middle of investigation I break down

Out of college money spent
See no future, pay no rent
All the money's gone, nowhere to go
Any jobber got the sack
Monday morning turning back
Yellow lorry slow, nowhere to go

But oh, that magic feeling
Nowhere to go
Oh, that magic feeling
nowhere to go
nowhere to go
Ah, Ooo, Ah, Ooo, Ah

One sweet dream
Pick up the bags and get in the limousine
Soon we'll be away from here
Step on the gas and wipe that tear away
One sweet dream
Came true today
Came true today
Came true today

One two three four five six seven
All good children go to heaven

Boy, you gotta carry that weight
Carry that weight a long time
Boy, you gotta carry that weight
Carry that weight a long time

I never give you my pillow
I only send you my invitation
And in the middle of the celebrations
I break down

Boy, you gotta carry that weight
Carry that weight a long time
Boy, you gotta carry that weight
Carry that weight a long time

Oh yeah, all right
Are you going to be in my dreams
Tonight?
And in the end
The love you take
Is equal to the love you make."

I wander stark naked;
I wonder half-baked again

I have come in pain
Here you go never again

Together, only in dreams
So happy together

Written by a Lover
Choice as a Mother

Alive and forever...
Unless what I choose
is nothing

I would even love

How is the weather?

I won't even speak a word

"Don't know why she's ridin so high
she oughta do right she ought do right by me"

I wish and hope and dream
for something more

then leaving me first
then making treaties
like we never were

"I've got every reason on earth to be mad, 'cause I've just
Lost the only girl I had. If I could get my way, I'd get
Myself locked up today, but I can't so I cry instead.
I've got a chip on my shoulder that's bigger than my feet, I
Can't talk to people that I meet. If I could see you now,
I'd try to make you sad somehow, but I can't so I cry instead.
Don't want to cry when there's people there, I get shy when
They start to stare, I'm gonna hide myself away, ay hay;
But I'll come back again someday.
And when I do you'd better hide all the girls, I'm gonna
Break their hearts all 'round the world. Yes, I'm gonna
Break them in two, and show you what your loving man can
Do, until then I'll cry instead."

Listless lovesongs all about you leaving me
None of them compare comparitively
to what we would have had
And yet I search the more

Because beauty to me is not my whore

"Well I'd rather see you dead, little girl
Than to be with another man
You better keep your head, little girl
Or I won't know where I am

You better run for your life if you can, little girl
Hide your head in the sand little girl
Catch you with another man
That's the end'a little girl

Well I know that I'm a wicked guy
And I was born with a jealous mind
And I can't spend my whole life
Trying just to make you toe the line

You better run for your life if you can, little girl
Hide your head in the sand little girl
Catch you with another man
That's the end'a little girl

Let this be a sermon
I mean everything I've said
Baby, I'm determined
And I'd rather see you dead

You better run for your life if you can, little girl
Hide your head in the sand little girl
Catch you with another man
That's the end'a little girl

I'd rather see you dead, little girl
Than to be with another man
You better keep your head, little girl
Or I won't know where I am

You better run for your life if you can, little girl
Hide your head in the sand little girl
Catch you with another man
That's the end'a little girl"

See what I know deep down
Is that I never coulda woulda ever brought you down
Never ever been in any way
Anything that would have ever sent you away

Concentratin on the grease
that's to the end
I li