I'm being used
don't, even for a minute
begin to think I don't know it
I can smell it
like a deer catching sharp
the scent of a predator
in cool mountain air
my sense's ar keen.
I know it and I accept it.
Through me
lies access to something you want
once obtained you will be gone
does this knowledge prove me
pathetic, ignorant, assinine?
No, prophetic maybe,
for I have my own secrets,
my own agenda
reasons you could not bear to know,
could not fathom,
for your view is obstructed
by self-serving blinders
and so you use me
I allow it,
and on occasion I can smile
sometimes it's enough
to be held
to feel the satisfaction
derived solely from the illusion.
Sometimes it's enough,
sometimes it's all it takes
to stop the decent of
that one single tear.
I know the choices we make
dictate the life we lead,
and so to thine own self be true.
We all turn predatory,
all of us have become the wolf at the door
claws exposed, fangs bared.
I have my own way,
my own itenerary,
and you can't honestly believe I'm not using you.

copyright December 1998

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