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darknessfairie
Loreyn Workman
United States, Texas, El Paso

Words: 177
Access: Public
Comments: 10

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Reflection

Water,
mirrors,
shadows,
eyes.
All reflectors of what I don't want to see.
I don't want to see me.

Look , my heart screams in agony.
My brain avoids people eyes,
fear of seeing what I am.

Look, my heart screams in agony.
I turn away from the shadows,
afraid of casting an unwanted glow.

Look, my heart screams in agony.
Afraid of reflections,
I break away from all my mirrors.

Look, my heart screams away it's death.
A thirsty mind longs for the touch of water.
Look, my heart screams with hope.

I see myself as I sip away
from that well of never-ending youth.

Then I see myself,
for the first time.

My soft skin glowing in the setting sun.
My long brown curly hair waving in the wind.
My dark eyes, wells of bottomless power.
I gasp at my astounding beauty.
Bronze flows in the air,
wrapping me in gold silk.
I compete with the sun to light up the earth
and there I am.

Bright as day yet,
dark as night.

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Comments  
DavidHe Comment by: DavidHe Online- 2008-06-29 19:00
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Great work! Well done. Best wishes.
Dakota Comment by: Dakota - 2008-01-25 14:45
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Looking at yourself has to be one of the hardest things we humans have to go through. This captures moments of it eloquently and with real feeling.
I came to read your work because of your editred name - and wasn't disappointed.
Thunderpen Comment by: Thunderpen - 2007-09-15 22:52
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On second reading, I disagree with Thunderpen. I think the comma IS in the right place. You are bright yet. You (or the protagonist) is full of darkness. Easy.

The protagonist needs to find some connection with True Love. That way, the protagonist can express that BLACKNESS and the lover will laugh and refuse to believe it of you. Thus you can express it, get rid of it, get a laugh from your lover, get on ...
Thunderpen Comment by: Thunderpen - 2007-07-14 16:14
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Nice development.
I did get a bit tired of the heart screaming, though.
Otherwise, I traveled with you, and very much liked the recognition of Self.
I wonder, though, is the comma in the right place with "Bright as day yet, dark as night." Should it be "...as day, yet dark..." Is it yet bright, or still dark?

I like.
Comment by: - 2007-06-17 20:36
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This is very powerful. I have experienced that fear of looking at myself. I understand the previous suggestions of breaking it up into stanzas, but I know the feeling that all of that just runs on without separations in thoughts.
Oh, I'm rambling.
Anyway...I felt is was a perfect description of that fear.
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