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ladyrobinhood
Michelle Oliver
United States

Words: 106
Access: Public
Comments: 2

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The Forest's Secrets

The forest
A world of depth and darkness and mystery.
The leaves shudder and wave,
Mocking us.
Proclaiming the secrets held within,
In a voice that must be seen, not heard.
The exposed leaves
Basking in the sun and its warmth.
Yet, inside it's dark and cold.
Protecting its treasures and
Secrets.
The vines keep their cold, desperate grasp on the trees, As if trying to keep them from telling their stories; Their ancient, aged stories from years long past.
Pieces of their knowledge.
Knowledge gained from the time spent watching;
Watching the world,
Watching life,
Watching Us.

Oh what secrets the forest could tell.

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Comments  
Comment by: - 2008-06-12 22:33
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This is a little black-and-white. Not enough word-pictures to really draw the reader in. Ok, the forest is a world of depth darkness and mystery. Pretty cerebral description. You need to tell us more specifically about how the depth looks, how the mystery feels, what is the darkness like?

Needs "colorizing"
ZIP--
prolificsantu Comment by: prolificsantu - 2008-05-29 19:56
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very lucid i must admit...you have caught a glimpse to write on...
Watching the world,
Watching life,
Watching Us.
this line is good...
1

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By ladyrobinhood

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