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8 - Marked by Slavery
marked
by
the whip
by
the chains
marked
by
the destruction
of family
of culture
of religion
of language
of tradition
marked
by the
desecration
of love
and sold
to the
highest
bidder
marked
by
five
hundred
years
of hypocrisy
of lynching
of castration
of breeding
like animals
marked
by
impotent
social
programs
by
hateful
archaic
men
who call
themselves
leaders
marked
by
these words
one
nation
under
god
indivisible
with
liberty
and
justice
for all
those
words
no
longer
apply
need not
apply
for they
will be
taken
freedom
and justice
are worth
fighting
for
and we
are all
marked
feel
the wind
there is a
revolution
coming
upon arrival
will you find
yourself lost
like a sparrow
in the rain
not knowing
what to do?
we
are
all
marked
by
the
slave
in
us
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Raw and marvelous! Just how I love to read some intense poetry. I'm Puerto Rican so I feel very strong about this topic. It remind me of our African Traditional Backgrounds. Its awesome!
~Gloriam |
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| I can identify with this completely, being of Jewish heritage. And the slave trade continues; the ethnic cleansing continues, and justice is still not served in most of the world. |
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The cadence is wonderful. It reflects the journey of one person or millions of people as we reflect on our lives and our country. I agree with the previous poster, the ending now fits the rest of the piece.
Definitely a poem that should be read out loud. |
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Hector, this is excellent. I can imagine this working well as a performance piece, an insistent rhythm beating out a song of truth and defiance. The one thing I felt was unnecessary was the "peace my brother" line. I think it broke up the rhythm somehow and ended it on a flat note. For me, anyhow, it should end with "by/the/slave/in/[all of] us". Excellent piece anyway, and reminds me of a work I wrote called "Your God", where you repeat the word "marked" over and over, as if you're inflicting the scars or have been inflicted upon yourself. Keep up the good work.
Paul :D |
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Comment by: brad19 - 2007-05-28 21:59
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| I love the structuring of this piece, the use of emotive words sums up so much meaning in the small space used. Its raw and beautiful. I loved it. |
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