I am the 54 year old mother of an adorable teenage son. At 14 I made the decision to adopt. Believing that when the time was right, it would happen, I did not hold back for the 'perfect'� time; I simply waited for my child. Chris came along when I was 39 1/2.

If you wait for the perfect time to "have" a child, whether by birth or adoption, you will never have one. You have to look into your heart and ask yourself: "Do I want a child?" A child -- not a baby. Babies grow up very fast. A child: a running through the house, laughing, crying, yelling, stringing toys everywhere ... gotta eat 24 hours a day ... where's Santa Claus ... why can't I stay up ... I've just discovered the wonder of "poofers" (flatulence to the lay person) ... oops, I spilled my drink on the rug again ... yes, I've worn out the sofa that is only three years old ... Mom, I broke your favorite lamp ... why can't I jump off the roof ... I spilled the milk in the refrigerator ... what will happen if I try to flush my toy ... Daddy I used your razor to shave the dog -- can I curl up in your lap ... let me wrap my arms around your neck ... Daddy, I love you ... can I sleep with you ... Mommy, I made you a card ... I picked some flowers for you (hope the neighbor doesn't mind) ... no one is as wonderful as my mommy ... my cheeks are so round ...my hair is so silky ... my little arms and legs are so vulnerable ... the back of my neck is so tender ... my little body so sweet ... my smile the beacon into your soul ... I make you feel like a kid again seeing through my eyes ... I love you so much.

I am yours.

I am a wonder of nature.

I am a miracle.

If that is what you want - go for it! I've never heard an adult complain about growing up poor if they grew up with love, but I've heard many, including myself, grow up complaining of no love, even if they were not poor. So, if you have it in your heart to love God's greatest gift, then you're ready. Whether you give birth or adopt, that is all that matters.

I have tried for years to meditate. I was always told to 'go to a peaceful place'� and there I would find serenity. I was never able to accomplish it until it finally came to me: now, when I begin my meditation, I envision my child with his arms wrapped around my neck, his little body snuggled up close to me ' and I am there.

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