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zayra yves
Zayra Yves
United States, California, Santa Clara

Words: 71
Access: Public
Comments: 5

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Dried Blood like Rust

The gang from underground
stinks the same
as a tyrant boss dressed
in haute couture
greasing the board table
with numbers that spread
like women
stale in the odor
of metal
godless under the purple circles
of their eyes
coughing in dry pimpled sarcasm
of bustin' ass
for medical insurance
and a few perks
on the edge of black fashion -
dressed in the shadows
of headless bodies
that cannot weep.

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Comments  
Rosie Sandler Comment by: Rosie Sandler - 2007-09-24 14:52
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OK, I think I got prostitutes. And maybe sweatshops?? But whose are the headless bodies in whose shadows they dress?

Am I anywhere near?

This is so strong, Zayra, with so many sharp images. I read the whole thing aloud, and it just reeled off the tongue - fantastic writing.
BrindleyHD Comment by: BrindleyHD - 2007-09-07 15:05
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I didn't get all the allusions here, but I loved the way this rolled out and didn't stop for anybody, least of all me!
frani Comment by: frani - 2007-09-05 09:06
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Great piece of work. Deep-set imagery and great metaphorical use throughout. Well done :)
jjsmith Comment by: jjsmith - 2007-09-05 03:29
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OH!!!!!!!!!!!!
dylan meets jagger
Thunderpen Comment by: Thunderpen - 2007-09-05 02:29
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Now this is sharp. It reads well. I just reread and it unfolded further. I think I will read it a third time.

What do you think of George Bush?

The clothing metaphor works well.

What would I criticize? This is keen as is.
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By zayra yves

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