writing community
Sign In Here | Lost Password | FREE Sign Up
E-mail: Password:
Remember login  
The place for writers:
Upload your writing in minutes, receive peer feedback from other writers, poets, authors, then get your work published out there in the real world.       Learn how other writers are doing it.

 
L J
Louis Harris
South Africa, Gauteng, Germiston

Words: 200
Access: Public
Comments: 8

Forward to a friend
Print Version
E-mail this writer E-mail this user 
View Author profile
Add to Readers  




Life

Jan bounced across the sea of sand, reached the top of the hill and suddenly disappeared. We had been instructed to remain in visual contact; I held my breath. A moment later her voice crackled inside my helmet. ‘Tom, you’d best come over here. You must see this.’

She stood on a rock staring across the sun-drenched valley, her space helmet held under her arm, and her golden hair wavered like a flag in the breeze. I gasped. My brows lifted. My mouth became dry. She should have been dead. Our instruments had registered zero life tolerance on this planet.

‘It’s safe to remove your helmet. The air is warm, thin and breathable’. She held up a single leaf with a whitish bloom, covered with a fine, bluish white powder in the shape of a human hand. It had a sharp, blade-like margin. An updraft of wind scattered the small blue leaves as they fell from the trees growing on the lee side of the hill. Each tree had five branches, each branch grew one blue leaf. I removed my helmet, breathed in the thin air, and reached for the leaf in Jan's fingers.

Smiling, I said, “Life.’

Want to comment on this Flash Fiction?
Sign up to Edit Red and you will be able to comment on Flash Fiction and get access to: Upload your own stories and poems, get readers and their feedback, promote your work...
Sign up






[Back to top]
Comments  
aprilstar Comment by: aprilstar - 2007-10-21 08:49
Add to Readers
      
Like Diane, I've never been into sci-fi much, but I enjoyed this piece. Awesome ending!
Ash19640 Comment by: Ash19640 - 2007-10-20 04:46
Add to Readers
      
Totally unexpected, science fiction flash; subtle and delicate. I love the image of blue leaves and the excitement of the first stirrings of permaculture on a barren planet. Excellent write Louis. Ash
mafsa Comment by: mafsa - 2007-10-19 19:27
Add to Readers
      
hello, sir!

i like this sci-fi piece much. the beautiful descriptions brought to life here kind of contrast the dark aura lurking behind genre used. thanks for sharing!

Mary:p
easywriter58 Comment by: easywriter58 - 2007-10-19 00:07
Add to Readers
      
A great visual especially the hair wavered like a flag (would write waving instead but this is cool)

I like the first person here. It makes it more real as I read it.

Imprint of a hand is unique! Gotta be careful-you are from Africa and you know about those flesh eating plants there (or oxygen absorbing plants)-could have one on this new planet. That handprint could just jump out and grab someone.
jjsmith Comment by: jjsmith - 2007-10-18 03:20
Add to Readers
      
wow louis this took me back to all those
innocent space stuff things
that stuff where they hold their space helmets
under their arm
sigh nostalgia
1 2 Next

Sponsored Ads


By L J


Featured Writers

Advertising - Terms & Conditions - Short Story Submissions - Contact - Writing Competitions - Writing Links - Book Promotion - Sky-Tribe.com - alanemmins.com
  Member short stories, poems, comments and other contributions are owned by the poster.
Copyright 2003 - 2007 Edit Red I/S