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7thSon
Seventh Son
United Kingdom

Words: 132
Access: Public
Comments: 8

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Darker

Darker.


It is empty and so very cold
Full of sorrow yet to unfold
Many a story not been told
Yet another soul has been sold

Fires are burning
Hearts are yearning

The contract is signed and agreed
The master will hastily plant his seed
Now the existence grows like a weed
All to become one of a creed

Fires are smoking
Hearts are longing

The master will soon give instruction
You will learn of life’s destruction
There will be certainly no distraction
All will be for the master’s satisfaction

Fires are smouldering
Hearts are floundering

The master is now in command
Cold and darkness across the land
Many a soul search has been planned
Grains of sand, grains of sand

Fires are extinguished with
The dreams of the heart

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Comments  
lancslass Comment by: lancslass - 2008-03-20 20:37
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Thank you for the last two lines, dark indeed without them, but a little hope at the end. I love the repetition of 'grains of sand'. I can see more than one interpretation -organized religion being one. Hope that's not PI. I don't claim much insight into serious poetry, but I think this is well done, and another one to make me think. Thanks
mitra Comment by: mitra - 2007-12-24 23:10
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This reminded me so much of the state of our world today at the same time, it can apply to a single person and their inner struggles. I like poems that work this way cause it leaves so much room for the reader to enjoy it.
tjnelson Comment by: tjnelson - 2007-12-16 09:32
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I see not jusr a good:evil theme, the God:Satan of things...I see the educational system...society telling us how to learn, how to write, like some kind of mechanics fix-it book. Good lay out and repetition helps add to the rhythm. Nice piece...
Falling Comment by: Falling - 2007-11-30 09:44
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Destination of unknown... grains of sand, grains of sand... the humankind. I liked your thought process throughout this piece. Devilish! If I were to think of good and evil, all the people that have lived and died and how to describe where one goes, I think I would write a lot like you. Too many to count, also a metaphor for hours, or time. Well thought out. Thank you for sharing.
RedWitch Comment by: RedWitch - 2007-11-18 13:47
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I really like this one, well done :)

Wendy x
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By 7thSon

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