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Prismatic teardrops fall from starlit eyes
Gathering darkness on the horizon
Furious waves come crushing the silence
Lost in the fury Mother Nature cries
Civilization of excess and lies
Shattering the womb that gave us our birth
Atrocities borne by children of Earth
Imminent doom that cannot be denied
Sucking the life from these nurturing lands
Taking for granted the blue of these skies
Passing days numbered like the hourglass sands
Counting the seconds to early demise
Wounded and broken this blood on our hands
Betrayed by man she has broken the ties.
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There are very potent feelings here and the use of language is confident and imaginative. However, I sense that this is not all you have to say on these matters.
For example the first two lines sound as though you're talking about rain and an approaching storm. Why not talk about it a bit so there is more of a build up to the point where we get to a revelation that "man has caused all the problems."
