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All of the Above
I question whether I am ready to feel this...whether or not I can handle it.
Every time I think I can...I question everything about it.
I think too much,
do too little,
say things at the wrong time,
and think things at the right.
I fall too easily and am not fallen for.
I chase
and find myself unchased.
I move forward while others take a step back (from me).
Maybe I come on too strong.
Maybe not strong enough.
Maybe I am over analyzing it all.
I'm sure that I am.
I know that I am.
This is always the way.
I need to take a step back from myself right now...
and breathe.
But it's hard....
I like the breathless feeling. I get addicted to it. The unsure. The fear of the unknown.
Where do I stand? Do I even have a place to stand here? If I move will I jeopardize everything? And if I jeopardize everything is that really so bad?
I could ask a million questions to the air...
and the air will answer back...in a haunting howl.
I still question whether I am ready to feel this.
I am still addicted to being breathless.
I think I am plenty strong.
I think I'll stick with it...
regardless of all of the above.
8•18•04
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I really like how you move from the neuroticisms of the present into uncertainty, and then direct that uncertainty towards the future. I find these thoughts very therapeutic in a strange way, and I think you address some really familiar issues in a unique way. very nice.
My only suggestions would be to work on "flow," or making your thoughts read succinctly after and into each other. The only reason I say this is because some parts transition beautifully while others are kind of choppy--which is not bad (for effect).
An example would be in your last stanza, where the first four lines rings very nicely one after the other, but the last line kind of sticks out. Again, my humble opinion, and I know its prose, but I guess I just want more of what some parts here tease me with. |
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