[Back to top]
|
|
|
|
Hahah! Cute!
I love how Enlightenment is only a penny, but that they know there's a chance of it being empty.
Why the, "Ouch!' ? Did he get smacked for his hippy bullshit? Did he cut himself on the wrapper?
Wow, I've been off the circuit for quite some time. This little story was just what I needed to read first, thanks! :) |
 |
Comment by: ac7904 Online- 2007-12-29 08:31
|
|
Terrific, funny and thought-provoking. You really pull off leading the reader to understanding your characters solely through dialogue. And it's biting too!
Who sent the rock? Him? That wasn't entirely clear to me. |
 |
Comment by: tcbswan - 2007-12-12 02:20
|
|
i love that this is nothing but dialogue...and the other thing--i associate pennies with wishes and wishes are sort of undirected prayers--that the package is empty is perfect (as in it is--the bar--what you need it to be). very clever!!! lot's of existential undercurrents running through this piece. or i could be reading too much into it!!! HAHAHA. at any rate, thanks for a great read. i've been out of the loop so i'm clueless about the prompt, but it read well even though i have no idea the lead in is. thanks for posting~
t. |
|
|
How you can create a story that is both powerful and humorous is beyond me. I'm in awe. (Would an enlightenment bar help? heehee)
“Oh for Christ’s sake…” - This line made me laugh out loud.
“…typical. It’s bloody empty!” - This line spurred on a discussion in my head. I'm sure it will last all day.
I'm so enthralled by the speed at which they want enlightenment. Is that a human desire or only a trait of the western world? Ah, well. Thank you for a most excellent piece of writing yet again.
-Rosalie |
 |
Comment by: karjon Online- 2007-12-11 05:49
|
|
It is funny, Costa. So God has a vending machine that sells Enlightenment bars?
'Brother' made me think of monks but I also thought of angels (perhaps one called Lucifer?). They try to get something out of the machine on Sundays (God being especially busy being praised on that day, won't notice their indiscretion).
Okay - I'll stop wondering now - and I'm probably talking nonsense.
Cheers
Karen |
| 1 2 3 Next |
