The Last Word and the First
You can get there by imagining an argument
Bent on the one hand toward fist fighting,
Listing on the other toward enumerations,
Accusations and inarticulate sputtering.
Clustering where the furry adversaries are caged,
Engaged by the exchange, a crowd gathers:
Agitators who ape the two or crane necks, laughing,
Chafing with simian fidgets for the looming brawl.
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I liked the form this one takes, Kenneth - the couplets work really well, here.
If it's the gathering crowd that's, 'Engaged by the exchange', I thought you could put a full-stop after 'caged'.
I particularly enjoyed 'simian fidgets' and, 'Bent on the one hand toward fist fighting,/Listing on the other toward enumerations'. Some great images of a dispute, here!
Where can you get by imagining the argument, by the way? To a first-and-last-word poem? |
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Comment by: esknapp - 2007-12-20 16:45
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Kenneth,
I think you showed excellent word choice here. The words feel interesting beyond their meanings. I think the rhymes are perfectly appropriate for this form - stick to your guns.
Eric |
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I like the way you've married the images of the imaginary argument with that of brawling monkeys!
Lol at Colin's comment about 'alligators' - i read that the first time too! Weird! Must be because of the apes; the 'furry adversaries'.
'Agitators who ape the two or crane necks, laughing,/Chafing with simian fidgets for the looming brawl.' - great line, fab image. That word, 'simian' is still ringing around my head! |
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| Sigh... I stink at rhymes. |
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Comment by: alien - 2007-12-13 04:07
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I think this is a great poem but I'm not sure whether my accent prevents some of the words rhyming. I saw a few dodgy rhymes in there, kenny.
But I did enjoy the piece! |
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