(5 lads on stage - visually akin to 'The Full Monty') - launch into Spice Girls 'Wannabe'

Lad 1: Yo... I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want.

Lad 2: So tell me what you want, what you really, really want.

Lad 3: I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want.

Lad 4: So tell me what you want, what you really, really want

Lad 5: (stuttering) I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna... (continues)

Lad 1 (to Lad 2): Ben's off again; must be time for a cuppa.

Lad 2: Yeah, too right.

Lad 3 (to Lad 4): You not into this then?

Lad 4 (to Lad 3): Not really, it's a bit of a girlie song... 'girl-power' and all that.

Lad 3 (to Lad 4): Oh, I suppose it is. I hadn't thought of that. (to all) Hey, lads. this is a bit of a girlie song. Can't we do something more masculine... a bit macho, like?

Lad 1: Yeah, right. Any suggestions?

Lad 2: What about that 'drinkin' song we used to do?

Lad 4: Yes, the 'drinkin' song, that was really 'laddish'.

Lad 3: Great, I loved that one.

Lad 1 (to Lad 4): Ben, we're gonna give the old 'drinkin' song a dust off.

Lad 5: (stops stuttering): Good, I think it was one of our better numbers. The crowd always got up and danced to that one. It's a blooming shame we stopped doing it.

Lad 1: Okay... one, two, three, four...

All Lads: I get knocked down, but I get up again, You’re never going to keep me down. I get knocked down, but I get up again. You‘re never going to keep me down… (continues)

Lad 1: I drink a whisky drink, I drink a vodka drink, I drink a lager drink, I drink a cider drink... (continues)

Lads 2 - 5: We’ll be singing, when were winning, We’ll be singing, when we’re winning (continues)

Lad 2: Oh, Danny Boy, Danny Boy, Danny Boy... (Continues)

All Lads 3 - 5: I get knocked down, but I get up again, You’re never going to keep me down. I get knocked down, but I get up again. You‘re never going to keep me down… (continues)

Lad 3: Don’t cry for me, next door neighbour… (continues)

Lads 4 + 5: We’ll be singing, when were winning, We’ll be singing, when we’re winning (continues)

Lad 4: Slam your body down and wind it all around, slam your body down and wind it all around, slam your body down and wind it all around… (continues)

Lad 5: Slam your body down,

All Lads: Zigazig, ah! (stop)

All Lads: great stuff…. Nice one… Good ending, Ben… That was a bit more like it… Still got it… (to fade)

End