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Conversation with myself
Nobody fully understands what they are supposed to be doing.
We’re all familiar with the prevailing theories,
so i won’t go into them here.
I’ll let u in on a little secret.
Writers don’t care. Not one little bit.
Perhaps when we we’re younger.
I myself considered for several years this Omnipotent being,
or that Almighty god. Seriously considered and well-thought out explanations about why we’re here,
and why this sort of thing is very bad,
and that other thing over there is very good.
The demon that drives a writer is more clever than these.
Oh, so clever.
The demon will say:
“Dump you wife.” “Quit Your Job.” “Start Drinking.”
I’m not at all suggesting that you do these things.
However, if they …..seem to happen, Embrace…
Now i hear some people saying, “you’ve got it all wrong!
Writers can be happy people!
Full of Hope and well respected in their community!
i say this unto you:
How many “Happy Writers” do you personally know?
How many have you read about in class,
or watched a documentary about?
It’s part of the Thing. the little wormy thing making this sexy wet dead dog being dragged sounds through your head and someone is telling you that “Everything is going to be ok.” and “Stay away from the light.”
Ah, demon.
An old woman with broken teeth
once told me
“writing is the most difficult thing you will ever love.”
Believe it.
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| very thought-provoking. I strive to be both happy and a writer, and as the eternal optimist that I am, I plan to accomplish both of those goals. It is interesting to me how much displeasure writing brings me. I have to make myself edit and even write sometimes, and I feel guilty when I don't write or don't write enough. I don't think writers are ever truly satisfied with their writing, though there are small bits of satisfaction along the way. We always think we can do more and better. |
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| I was very young when this was first written. There have been many rewrites. I still like this one and keep it around to remind me of where i was then. Full of hope and possible futures. I'm older now, but it still makes me smile. There are few of these, so i say thank you and leave them be. |
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Comment by: Nora Online- 2008-01-16 11:48
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| Interesting. I'm going to chew on this for a while. You've provoked thought. Must ruminate... |
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Jeez, that's some deep shit, Mark. Couldn't have said it better. My little demon keeps knocking my half-full glass off the table and breaking it into a million pieces.
But to even call myself a writer is like my mother, who does CERAMICS, calling herself an artist! It's a silly joke, but not a funny one. Snort! |
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