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amber3212
Amber M
United States

Words: 274
Access: Public
Comments: 4

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drowning in the fire

all this anger burns up inside of me
i'm suffocating, i can barely breathe
maybe, just maybe, you'll be all that i need
in the end, you could be the one to save me
to put out this raging fire
when we thought it couldn't get any higher
you'll come on the scene
and put out the unseen
fire that keeps growing higher and higher
oh tell me, when will it stop?
when will this level of anger drop?
tell me what i need to do
tell me who i need to be
cause in the end you could be the one to save me
maybe, it will be your undying love that saves all of us from this hell
maybe, it will challenge the impossible, and make all things well
your love will save us from the depths
and when we're out, we'll wonder yet
how we came got out
of this burning, raging, and unrequited fire
that just seems to be blazing higher and higher
we will walk out with no scars
no marks on our arms
in the future, thos marks and scars we won't need
because we already have all of those memories
they just can't seem to escape the fire
that just keeps burning higher and higher
when we finally get out
we won't shove, nor shout
but we'll stay silent, without a sound
we'll fall on our knees
as they all come back
all those memories
maybe, just maybe...
you'll be the one to save me
from this fire that just keeps burning higher and higher

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Comments  
DickGentile Comment by: DickGentile - 2008-01-27 15:16
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Consuming the self not as a whole either.
wizzer Comment by: wizzer Online- 2008-01-21 13:32
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words must just swirl in your brain!
i do usually offer what i can in the nitpick department but i am really no expert. (especially when it comes to my work!)
xxxgeo
amber3212 Comment by: amber3212 - 2008-01-21 12:58
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i wrote this at 3 in the morning, and i wrote it in like 10 minutes. so i know it could use A LOT of improvement... don't be afraid to tell me what i need 2 fix, because i know there are many things wrong. thanks <3
wizzer Comment by: wizzer Online- 2008-01-21 12:52
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excellent work! rythm! the rhymes aren't contrived. it builds with good pace. flows beautifully to me
you do it again
xxxgeo

undying love ...i prefer this without the undying as it is a bit cliche

thos marks and scars...?those
1

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By amber3212

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