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| I like your title. I think you should keep it. It's not obvious...but not everything has to be in poetry. That's the great thing about poetry...you can leave people wondering sometimes. |
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| Not what I was expecting at all...but I really liked it all the same. |
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| I enjoyed this, simple and straight to the point. Sometimes we do have to fall down to our knees in order to understand and appreciate the simplicity of standing. You conveyed that point very well, even if it wasn't the point you wanted to convey, haha. |
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Comment by: jesscat - 2008-01-26 17:22
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| Oh yeah thanks for pointing out that typo there! I hadn't titled it, and that was the first title i could think of. Have you seen Catch Me if you can? yeah I got the title off of that. If I make the poem longer, I'll probably bas it off of that. thanks for the comment |
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Comment by: - 2008-01-26 17:02
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I liked this piece it’s simple but gets the point across. I do have some suggestions though firstly on the 4th line change now to know. It’s not a big deal but I didn’t know whether you wanted it to be now or know until I read the last line. Also why don’t you try adding the title to the piece I believe it would make it stronger and work as a whole better. Anyway it’s all up to you.
Great piece!! |
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