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| Lovely and sweet. Captures that perfect moment of the first kiss. I'm adding to library too. |
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| That really has to be one's fondest memory...thanks for the memories... |
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Comment by: MsWizard Online- 2008-07-13 18:00
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There is nothing sweeter than a first kiss is there Tony? No matter where life leads me, I always carry memories of first kisses....
Beck I just saw this comment...perhaps you are right. I will need to contemplate that first line as I myself love this poem and would love to share it... |
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| Going back a bit, I wonder if the magic is still there... going back I remember how breathless and dizzy first kisses made me. I have to say they were far more memorable than any sex. Thanks for sharing this one Alicia ... I need to add it to my library! :) |
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Comment by: Beck Online- 2008-01-30 07:41
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I think this is beautifully written and I really enjoyed every part other than the first line... "a damp warmth" I think this could have been more delicately worded. It did draw me in to the poem as I was browsing the new uploads but for the wrong reasons.
I would scrap the first line completely and start with "as lips meet".
I really do think this is a beautifully delicate piece of writing that's just maybe (for me) thrown off by the opening line. |
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